I am a grandma, fostering my newborn granddaughter. Although the parents are being given time and resources to become adequate parents, at this time they are not utilizing the available resources. There is a high probability that long-term placement of the baby will be needed. As the grandma, I have a kinship preference, should I choose to adopt her. However, I’m concerned about being in my early fifties, and how this may impact family dynamics down the road. Looking for feedback, negative and positive, from anyone that’s been through this, whether as the provider or the child. I do have public resources available, am looking more for firsthand experience feedback. Thank you!
I wish my grandpa would had lived long enough to adopt me!!! Take this opportunity! Ur grand baby will be greatful u were there I promise. My mom chose drugs over me n my dad chose murder over me. If my grandpa would had been alive when everything went south, I know he woulda taken me in a heartbeat. But I was left alone to suffer n not even cps, which I called many times MYSELF did anything. And I had to heal from the trauma alone n grow up very young. Ur grand daughter is so blessed to have u! I promise age won’t matter to her . She’ll just be thankful you loved her enough to take her in and give her the best life you could
I have family in this situation. They didn’t adopt the poor kid went back and forth with the parents in horrible environments that had a really negative effect on her. Now she is older and back with the grandparents anyway. It is completely dependent on if you think you could handle it. If so I say go for it. At least you know for a hundred percent that she will be in a good home. As to the family dynamics later. They have given away any right to be concerned about anything. As long as you stick to your guns you should be ok. But definitely put serious thought and consideration into what is going to come. If it was me I’d take the opportunity to take her. Because I know down the road I’d regret it if I didn’t.
Kinda shocked youre asking this. I am my grandbabies VOICE and the parents know that. I have more than the best interest of my babies that cant speak or speak up. .
My grandfather adopted me when I was 12. He was in his late 60s at the time. It’s one of the things he was most proud of. That baby will be thankful you do you it when she gets old enough to understand. Be the blessing that lol girl needs
Although I Can not speak from your standpoint. I had 2 children in my 20s and now have 2 more. I’m 50 and the youngest are 11 and 13. I have found I have more patience and enjoy the little things. You have an amazing opportunity, I pray it goes whatever way is best for everyone
Im inmy mid fifties n i would step in in my child was not able.it is hard but could you live with a decision,not to its all up to you.pray you find the right answer
You will never regret adopting her. If she needs you, you should be there
If you do decide to do it i would have a willed agreement on who the child goes to if you were to ever pass away to prevent the parents from getting the child back.
I received my granddaughter when she was 6 maths old. I was 47. There’s good times and bad times. Never give up on them especially if your all she has. She’s 14 now and seeing her grow into herself as a teen is very interesting. Best of luck to you! You won’t regret it!
I have a former coworker that adopted his granddaughter and he’s never regretted it and he was in his late 60s. Being in your 50s is nothing! You wouldn’t be able to live with yourself if your granddaughter was placed with someone else.
The alternative is likely foster homes and if you haven’t heard the horror stories that go along with them you should definitely research it. I can’t imagine letting anyone else take my grand kids.
My mother is in the same position as you she actually has custody of 3 of her grandkids from my sister. She is 50. It is frustrating and hard and may seem impossible sometimes but it is totally worth it to her!!! She couldn’t live with herself knowing her grandkids are out there in the world somewhere in foster care and she cant see them.
Personally I’d think she should be with family over someone different. Idk the situation but you are family and if they need to home her permanently somewhere she could go to some people you guys don’t know, I’m not saying it’s a bad thing because there are amazing people out there waiting to adopt but I think you get what I mean. It’s up to you if you want to take on that responsibility. You raised your kids and did all that already and it can be hard as you get older. It seems to me that ur saying the parents aren’t really trying to do much to get her back?? They might want to be in her life in the future and it would be easier with you having her than someone else (I’m not exactly sure) but if she were to be with a new family and they were taking care of her Do you know if it would be an open adoption? That they would be able to come into her life if they wanted to at some point??? I don’t know too much about this kind of stuff but those are just some things I would take into consideration. Good luck💗
Take this opportunity I was raised mostly by my grandparents and my brother was raised completely by our grandparents please if you can take this opportunity take it
If you have the energy go for it
Yes! Yes! Yes! I lived with my grandma when I was younger and went back with my dad when I was about 12 because my grandma had passed. But I would do anything to have her back. Especially when my mom was going through it. My grandma was there when no one else was
Do you there will be no regrets. That baby belongs within the family if possible
I am 44 and my husband is 57 we have a year old little boy. If you are able to, take that precious baby.
My grandma adopted both my cousins and raised them their whole lives. They were about 5 and 3 when she got custody of them. I don’t see anything wrong with grandparents raising grand babies.