Idk what to do anymore. I have three kids, two from a previous relationship and one from the current. My bf owns the house we live in n his mother lives with us. My youngest is his, and he is two months old. My bf works, and I stay at home with the kids. My dad is currently in the hospital on life support. And our son has yet to meet him bc my bf doesn’t like the fact that they smoke (outside their home) so I haven’t been “allowed” to go over there and visit since he was born. Well, today we were supposed to go to the hospital and see him, and my bf starts this huge fight goes back to our house gets out of the car throws the car keys n $40 at me slams the door and gets into his truck and drives off. All in front of the kids (8 yrs, 7yrs and two months old). I have left previously while I was pregnant with my youngest, and I thought we had worked through our issues, but anytime anything doesn’t go the way he wants it to, it’s a battle. He constantly calls me a stupid bitch and constantly bitches about the house bc I don’t want dust and mop every single day. I dust once a month n I mop every other day. I’m not aloud to go anywhere without him unless it to pick my kids up from school. They can’t participate in anything unless he can go too bc I could be “talking, flirting, or fucking” someone else (I’ve never in my life cheated on him or anyone else for that matter). He has zero trusts towards me n blames it bc I left him before. Well, anyway today I go see my mom by myself with the kids for a brief minute before she goes to the hospital and gets a coffee n comes back to his house. N, he is sitting in the living room talking shit about me to his worthless mom! (She sits around does nothing takes a bath, hell if I didn’t fix her dinner plates she would starve. She pisses on the floor in a bucket or on a blanket n doesn’t clean it up ever I have to!! That’s why I call her worthless) she sits here when he isn’t around and tells me constantly I don’t deserve what he is doing to me I deserve better. But then sits in there n talks him up on being a dickhead to me?? Wth do I do? I have no job, nowhere to go. My mom’s house is full. And he is spiteful he n his momma would claim I’m unfit because I have no way to support my kids. Keep in mind when I meet him, I had a job and was making $15 an hour plus bonus checks monthly totaling in about $1000 bonus every month. But he didn’t like me working bc other men would be around. N I wanted to be a stay at home mom. I didn’t know it would turn out like this, or I would of never quit my job. I need advice on how to handle a heartless ass hole without losing my kids or going homeless. I can’t keep faking this smile much longer. I’m becoming more and more depressed by the hour.
Any chance of you qualifying for daycare/rent/food support? Is it possible to make it work temporarily at your parents house so you can go back to work and get on your feet?
Also maybe local churches can help you secure a place.
You need to contact churches and shelters. It would be better than where you are and safer for both you and your kid’s then staying in an abusive relationship. Not only is that not good for your kids to see but it will teach them get that is okay Behavior because you stayed and dealt with it. It will be hard and it will be rough and it will probably want to be one of the most hardest thing you’ll ever have to do but you need to leave that environment now ASAP! You need to think what is best for you and your children he is a worthless piece of crap and he is never going to change, he is controlling and before too long it will get physical and maybe even worse. Leave before you end up six feet under the ground and never get the chance to save you or your kids. Get a restraining order against him for you and your kids and take his butt to court
Get a job and go to dhs office n apply for help to find a place n leave
I was in an abusive relationship for seven years until I finally wised up and left if I wouldn’t have he would have literally killed me. The last three days with him he had me tied to a chair can you beat me he raped me and when he fell asleep I was able to loosen the tape around my hands and feet grab my baby and get the hell out
You better leave while they’re still four of you alive and that won’t be for much longer
He made you quit your job because that’s how he now controls you
Yeah no. Sweety. U need to be gone. He is pulling u down to his low level… Get out. Asap…
Sounds like he is doing nothing but controlling you. It’s time to leave, now!
You’re dealing with two narcissists…I know you’d hate to stay at a shelter, but it would be temporary while you got on your feet. I’d contact shelters, churches and if you have family you trust, possibly stay with them. He sounds like the type to lose it when he realizes you’re gone for good…every woman thinks her man wouldn’t do it, I was that woman myself, but take you and your children’s safety seriously and limit any contact with him and only see him with somebody you trust present and document every single thing including his verbal abuse and his mother’s disgusting behavior in case he tries to fight you in court.
You might need to reach out to all the above… you didn’t mention physical abuse but he seems abusive… and leaving an abusive relationship is the most dangerous. I would recommend an app like https://www.whengeorgiasmiled.org/aspire-news-app/ to start and women’s shelters… they will allow you to get on your feet with the children.
Bye Felisha! As soon as possible.
You definitely need to leave. Contact your local department of health and human services office and try to get emergency help. They might be able to refer you to a shelter or someplace safe if your parents house isnt an option. Also sometimes pediatrician’s offices can help you with information.
Spend most of your time visiting your dad in the hospital. Talk to your mom. Try to get your old job back. Do what you can to get out of the situation with him as soon as possible, take your kids, and move away. Get public assistance and find a subsidized home. Get on a list for housing right away,.
I know it’s hard to just leave and you’re scared of the outcome…for me, it’s living in poverty…living a life different than what I know. But, if you are being abused verbally, you have to think about the messages that is sending to your children right now and how you want them to be raised. This is the hardest decision of your life, and if you leave, you will miss him and the comfort of living the way you once did. You WILL need support and ALL OF THE HELP you can get, and will HAVE TO MAKE IT A POINT TO STAY AWAY FROM HIM! Girl, do you want your kids to grow up thinking that they can treat (or be treated) this way? No mother does. But this is a tough one. I know you can’t just leave. Make some calls. Call some shelters! Take other women’s advice. You only have to live this way if you choose to. I will be praying for you mama.
This is why we have womens shelters! You need to get out before your SO gets violent! He’s a control freak! You’re not safe!
Time to put your big girl panties on. Leave and get a job
Get a job and a place then leave.
He’s cheating. Or has cheated