I really need advice for my daughters behavior

I need some serious advice for what to do with my eight years old. She is so ungrateful, rude, bossy, demanding, and just constantly argues no matter what it is that you say, she has to argue. She spends most of her time screaming and especially at me, her mother. You can never please her. No punishment or discipline seems to help or change things. She was making progress for a little bit, and then she went back to the old behavior except worse. I’ve tried taking things away, the loving approach, the screaming approach, I’ve done programs to help, I’ve ignored and, I’ve cried, I feel like I have done it all. I notice the good, I spread my attention around, I spend quality time with her, I honestly am at a loss. She becomes so destructive when angry. She has a doctor’s appt on Feb 16th. Her behavior has me feeling so depressed and burnt out, and I just need some advice. Has anyone else dealt with this with their child or children? How did you cope?

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How old is she? Screaming back isn’t effective. Are you staying consistent with the programs you’ve tried?

I’m wondering if she doesn’t need an outlet for her time/attention. Art/sport etc. is she in school or virtual? Sometimes kids take it out on the only person around. She could have pent up emotions that she doesn’t know how to express. I’d seek therapist who can help.

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Put her in her room with no toys TV etc. When she wants to act right then she can interact with you again. She’ll get them point eventually if you stay consistent. No one wants to be around you when your act like a spoiled brat.

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She could be on the verge of starting puberty… I’m currently going through this with my 8 yr old… And we’ve noticed big mood changes

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First make sure her mental health is in order. Sometimes people who suffer depression one of the signs is lashing out. If that’s not the case honestly I would say take absolutely everything away from her until she learns to appreciate you and her behavior changes consistently changes. I want you to decide to give things back if her behavior regresses you take her things away again. Take away absolutely everything except for her bed a pillow and a blanket

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Put her in her room!

Hell, I would of been picking up my teeth from the floor if I yelled at my mother. I be damned :joy:

Yesss same and mine is 7 almost 8 and im at an end with what to do

We’ve tried everything but the one thing that calls get down is sending her to her room with nothing and then when she calms down she can come out or play

Yes my granddaughter was the same way for awhile. We started her on therapy and she is doing alot better now.

I have a friend who claims that her sons behavior changed so much once they stayed doing yoga together twice a day. They do it to start and end the day.

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My daughter went through this at that age, we started her on a low dose of Lexapro for childhood anxiety. It was a huge change, along with continued work from us of course, not just meds. But she is no longer on the meds. And does great.

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Mine is 11, male. Epic meltdowns…therapy helped, I found that swimming and a Home Depot 5 gallon bucket with drumsticks helped as well. Best wishes, it’s hard, I know…

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We are In a pandemic everyone forgets how hard this is on kids it’s not just adults that are stressed nothing is the same they can’t be with mates it’s gonna be hard bear with her

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Model respectful conversation. If she says she doesn’t want to talk, listen to her, you can’t force conversation. If she’s refusing to do things that are asked give her proper choices (dishes now or dishes after the next meal(and more of them)). If she’s asking for space give it.
Talk to her and ask what she needs, maybe she is burnt out too and hasn’t found an appropriate outlet.
She’s also heading right into puberty soon, so her hormones may be wonky too.
Life is stressful right now and we expect so much from children; that we don’t even expect from other adults

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Around 7 my daughter became VERY destructive she ruined a 3rd generation vanity she cut her window screen and emptied her piggy bank out it which was about $70 she would empty all her clothes and toys out she would break toys, shred paper, draw on the wall or couch. Finally I took EVERYTHING I made her give it ALL away I mean ALL. She had a bed on the floor because she wrecked her princess canopy bed it looked like Cinderellas carriage. She had books kept on my book shelf. I put her TV in my room took her DVD player and tablet. For 1 year an ENTIRE year she had nothing but her bed and 1 book at a time. She could watch TV with us in the livingroom. We don’t have video games I don’t allow them in my house. He’d behavior drastically changed. She loves to read now and is a full grade ahead in reading (she just turned 10) she plays very well with her 3 little siblings, she got her own cat that she is amazing with. She appreciates the things she has. She gets $ for helping with laundry and cleaning up with her siblings and helping load and unload the dishwasher. It’s never much usually around $5 a week. She helps maybe 3 chores a week lol but I don’t even have to bribe her she just offers to help.

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Sounds like she could have add, or adhd. Maybe look into those as well.

My 9 year old has been this way since she was 5, turns out she has autism and possible bipolar disorder. She is on medication for it much to the dismay of me and her dad. But she is doing better not 100% but enough to notice.

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have her thyroid checked mines been all over the place most of my adult life and some days are horrible. she may as well be going through puberty and may not be able to deal with the hormones’. If all that is in check like someone else said a good slap in the mouth with make her rethink yelling at you. I did that to my momma once and once was enough for me to get it. I agree with taking everything and making it more of a “jail” walls blankets and pillows thats it. Ive had the happen to me and at 12 i learned quick that shit isnt fun. Stay with what every you pick. I have a 12 4 and 2 year old stay on what ever you pick.