For those of you who have been cheated on. How did you know it was happening to you? I have been married for 10 years and lately he had been very secretive. We have never really had any relationship issues but for some reason in my gut I feel like he is actually cheating on me. He started randomly working late, I found an extra phone in his pants pocket and asked him about it and he said he got it for our child… But our kid still hasn’t gotten it and why would it be open and in his pocket? I don’t know what to think anymore. Someone please help me figure this out.
I think it’s just intuition. I mean when I was with my ex husband, this was a frequent thing he did too. Extra phone, being all secretive, busy line, always giving working overtime. In the end I just asked him honestly and even asked to check his phone but he refused so I had to do it secretly. I don’t know what upset me more, not knowing and assuming or finding out my assumptions were spot on. So if you are going down this path of revelation you would also need to be mentally strong to face it.
I would just check his phone whenever the opportunity comes. I know people say trust is important but if you’ve asked him and it is not adding up, don’t wait…he’s your spouse. If you find out he isn’t cheating, still tell him you went through his phone and explain why. I did it and found something that isn’t considered cheating to society but it is to me. I brought it up and even told him I checked his phone after that because I had found what I found the first time. My spouse completely understood why I felt the need to check.
I’m going through this right now. Follow your gut. My guy went as far as making fake work adds to try to hook up with people he had met on sites to try to hide it from me right under my nose. This is a painful path I’m on, and you too will feel the pain. Follow your gut! Follow those feelings that tell you something is wrong- every time I get those feelings somethings going on. I’m sending good vibes your way and stay strong ok.! You should have went through that phone, I’d ask him for it and if he lies or gets upset don’t let him make you feel bad- don’t fight but don’t take any crap either. If he doesn’t want to act like an adult and be honest tell him you want to end it (even if you don’t) let him know your his partner in life, a friend, let him know you are there for him and you expect the same in return. My man is having such a hard time leaving that part of his life in the past… we just hit 6 years together and we deal with this at least once a year. I hope you all figure it out