Those of you that have partners who work away from home or out of state, what is expected when a partner comes home? Do they have duties they need to fulfill when they come home? Is it too much to ask that they be a parent after they come home from work tired?
I’m not in this situation but I feel like if you’ve been taking care of the kids alone while your partner is away working, then you definitely deserve a break! You didn’t get pregnant by yourself and you shouldn’t have to parent alone. It’s hard work raising kids!
I don’t think it’s ever too much to ask a parent to be a parent…
Both are doing an awesome job keeping your household, he works away providing for the family and you work at home taking care of everyone, be proud of yourselves…after all you are the helper for your man, don’t be ashamed and start comparing with other couples that her husband besides working helps her take care of everything else, bless their home but are they happy? Just be content with what you have and what you’re both are building together, learn to be patient, ask him, be vocal and with patience and soft words can overcome a lot!..God bless you!
I mean they should be a balance. I don’t think he should have to come home and you just check out and expect him to do everything, but when he’s present he should help.
I say team work u feed n bath them n he put them to bed. That what me n my husband does its easier on both of us since we work hard him working n my taking care of the household.
If he lives there… He has as much of a responsibility to help clean and tend the kids as you do… This isn’t 1950… We aren’t June and ward cleaver…
A relationship is 50/50 in everything.
If he can’t or won’t help… Get him gone… I mean you’re already practically a single mom… If you’re doing it all yourself. Why have a full grown baby there to slow you down
When my husband works away when he gets home that first night I don’t ask or expect him to do anything but every day after that it’s back to normal with both of us doing the parenting. You find what works for your family and you run with it
We are a family when he gets home and do where it needs done.
The only thing my husband does is work so when he comes home he does his half. Because the other 5 days or so he is gone I’m on call 24/7.
My partner doesn’t work away but does go to work every day.
Its still expected that you clean up after YOURSELF and love/play/parent the children
I don’t expect anything, but my husband does stay with our daughter when he is home so I can go get a pedicure, or go shopping or get groceries! I let him rest for a couple of days before I go do my thing though.
Of course-parenting is the most important part of your household!
Tell him to help and parent. Kids are not a job and it took two of you to make them, not just you.
You should definitely give him a break right when he gets home. Maybe don’t ask anything of him for an hour. Maybe he can help with baths and bedtime because those are later?
My husband and I both work outside the home, 40 hours a week min for both of us, we both do house work and we both parent.
So, my hub works until 5PM, bedtime starts at 730, so that gives us 2.5 hours as a fam. I’m home all day, so I do 99% of the chores and cooking. My hub works a high stress job so when he gets home I let the kids give him some love and then we leave dad alone to decompress for a little bit. After that I usually only ask that he entertains the kids for a bit, and he will usually insist on doing other things because I’m his “queen” who has been working all day and needs a break (his words not mine). Then its bed time, which is my duty since the kids are used to me doing it. On his days off I expect him to help with kids, clean up whatever messes he makes, and usually anything work related is his job too. I’m not a traditionalist but I dont see the sense in sitting around all day in a messy house waiting for him to get home to help, I’m literally doing nothing else but taking care of kids so might as well clean, cook, etc.
Me and mine don’t have kids yet but he works out of town hell help me clean and cook etc but mostly for the short time he’s in I want him to just relax and spend time with me. But if we had kids yes I would expect him to be a parent as well
I would say first, there was a study about mens Testosterone being depleted by the time they come home. That it will renew itself within a half hour if you don’t attack them and don’t put requirements on them. Men need that. I sound like one of those women but I so am not. So don’t sit down and talk to him about what happened, what you need, what needs to be fixed, what bills are due, none of that. Give him at least a half hour to take a breath. And then now it’s not too much to ask him to help to be a parent cuz you also need that breath
Honestly… I dont ask my husband to do anything… Weekends I occasionally have him watch the kids so I can go to the store alone. But hes the bread winner and works outside 12 hours a day… I honestly feel kinda bad
My husband was an OTR truck driver. When he came home it was just for 2 days at a time. I made sure everything was finished before he got home. That way the kids and i could enjoy him the 2 days he was with us!