Is it hard to adopt as a single parent?

I want to adopt a baby in the near future. I am a single mom with two girls, and I live in NC how hard would it be to adopt a baby being a single mom? I also have a good-paying job

17 Likes

Start by fostering if that’s an option for you. Ten of thousands of children needing to be housed

5 Likes

You’ll need a lot of $$$. It’s like 50k just for paper work. Lots of time off from work to do interviews and house checks. Etc. If you dont care about age group. Try fostering for a year or 2 and maybe then adoption. I know someone who did fostering. Then filed to adopt the kids.

1 Like

Adopting through an agency is extremely difficult on the best of circumstances. I second the foster-to-adopt program. You have to go through their training and prove you can financially undertake the kiddo. But it’s very rewarding.

1 Like

Fostering would be your best bet! I have a friend who is a single Foster mom and has legally adopted 3 of her fostered kiddos, and still fosters.

1 Like

It’s extremely difficult even for a married couple with 2 well paying stable jobs to adopt. A single parent is going to find it nearly impossible. Best bet is to either foster (if you can) and apply to adopt that child or find a private party who will adopt directly to you without using an agency. Regardless of the route you take, it is very expensive. Paperwork, lawyers, etc adds up quickly.

It will probably be easier/cheaper to do a private adoption than going through an agency.
You could also apply to do Foster-Adoption through your state. I know of a few people through my church who were able to adopt as a single parent by fostering the child first.

Adopting babies privately can be pretty expensive $30,000+ so I have heard. Adopting from foster care is virtually free outside of finalization/attorney fees. Most states you don’t have to foster beforehand you can adopt only. Depends on your state. Many lawyers will finalize for free or reduced rates as well. Here’s the link to all waiting children available for adoption in the United States.

I adopted my oldest son, and it didn’t cost me tens of thousands of dollars…but that could’ve been my particular situation. The question of whether you could legally adopt depends on a large number of factors, so I can’t really answer that question. They’ll look at your criminal, medical, and financial history to determine whether you’re qualified. The requirements will also vary based on the type of adoption you’re seeking. Is it a child you’ve never met? A family member? A friend? Is the child already residing with you? Have the biological parents’ rights already been removed? If not, are you seeking consent or arguing abandonment? All of these things factor in to each individual case. If you are seeking adoption of a child that doesn’t currently reside with you or the child of a relative/friend/consenting parents, the best piece of advice I can give you is to consider all the variables in adoption and get a clear idea of what it is that you want before you start the process. Do you want a baby? A toddler? A preteen? A vast majority of children awaiting adoption weren’t given up voluntarily, but forcibly removed by the state. Are you willing/able to deal with the trauma that results from those experiences? Do you want a perfectly healthy child or special needs? Do you want a child that has no contact with the biological family or are you okay with overseeing their contact? The biggest thing I run into when people ask me about adoption is that they have this idea in their head of picking out a perfectly healthy baby and taking them home and that’s that. Now, those types of adoption do happen, but the vast majority are not so cut and dry.

It depends on the state and county. Sometimes just a good paying job is not enough for them to say yea go ahead have this child. You should contact an adoption attorney and have them help you with the process. Or even see if they have free consultations to see what all needs to happen. That way you can start somewhere. If it’s the near future you will want to have all your ducks in a row before you even try.

2 Likes

It’s gonna be pretty difficult. Most agencies and even courts have an old school mindset that a child needs two parents to raise a healthy well rounded family. They’re also gonna see that you already have two other kids and likely feel that even with a good paying job that it’s too much on one person. Your home has to be just perfect as well in size and cleanliness (which they’re OCD about) when they come do the checks and will require you to pass a psych test among other things. Just for them to come through and deem your house suitable they charge 5k. Sorry to say but as a single parent I wouldn’t get my hopes up

Get a hold of an adoption lawyer and go from there. They will be able to give you all the information you need and without discourag you.

1 Like

Let’s just put it this way a good stepping stone is Fostering. They help you through the legalities and lots of little ones that need homes in the system.

8 Likes

If you have a good paying job why not support a family in need? Keep families together by supporting them rather than putting a child through the trauma of adoption.

28 Likes

Foster to adopt is unethical because the goal of foster care is reunification. Just don’t. And know that no infant needs you. There are huge lineups for womb wet infants and it’s fully unethical. Put your money towards preserving families. Most need $1000 or less to get thru whatever temporary/pregnancy related crisis they face. Help prevent generational trauma and support families directly thru groups like saving our sisters

21 Likes

Wouldn’t it be better to help a family stay together than to take a baby from its mother? Research adoption trauma.

18 Likes

I’m a single mom and I adopted 4 children in the state of California from the fostercare system. Honestly I had no issues.

5 Likes

I adopted a little girl 2 years ago alone (I’m UK) however have friends done it solo in US. It’s a very straightforward process much as a couple application nowadays. Good luck xx

2 Likes

The demand for infants has exceeded the supply. There are dozens of hopeful adoptive parents waiting for each infant born to a mother whose considering relinquishing her rights. You won’t be adopting a baby soon so maybe put your energy into something more helpful like supporting at risk families in your area.

9 Likes

Support locking up shitty fucking parents who choose drugs over raising their kids :heart: love support adoption from an adopted child thankyou

10 Likes