Is this too much or a healthy discussion?

I have two older teenage daughters, and neither has wanted to drive yet (so no real independence from myself or my father). I would expect them to start dating soon, as they haven’t yet. Being more liberal and feminist, I like to think they will approach sexual health and sex in a pragmatic way. I have been considering giving them a gift card to Amazon, which they could use to pick out and order a vibrator. I hope they can learn and understand their bodies themselves in private, prior to starting relationships with other people. Although I find this acceptable personally, I have been raised in such a conservative and sex-shaming home myself, I just haven’t brought myself to the conversation with them. Is this just “too weird” or on track for open, healthy discussion with my girls?


No offense. I think that’s very weird. I feel like masturbation is something you figure out on your own.


Healthy, open conversations are best. :wink: i wish you good luck


I personally think this is strange and not a good idea and I would be really embarrassed as a teenager having this conversation with my mom. And my mom was extremely open. I think masturbation is about self-exploration and I’m thinking you probably don’t need to buy them a vibrator.


:heart::heart: to many this is probably taboo. I didn’t get sexual health talks. (Btw wish I did even if I was shy about it) Communication goes a long way to me. Just be open and see if they are receptive. Give them the cards and the choice. Tell them its nothing to be ashamed about and leave it at that. Let them decide when and how they’ll take it from there. :heart::heart::heart::heart: best of luck momma.


I find it very weird tbh. I just feel like that’s an adult thing and probably not for children to start doing. But I know we all have our own parenting preferences. I just personally wouldn’t be doing that…
I know children start to learn how to do that stuff on their own, but I think a vibrator is a little too much


I think it’s unconventional, but if it seems natural and you have open conversations for your family, then go ahead. When my boys become older they will be supplied with condoms.


Um…yikes…they’re teens. I dont think you want to end up with a pregnant teen…do you?


Healthy sex talks and questions etc totally ok but I’d draw the line at buying your daughters vibrators… I’d say that’s more of a personal thing they should decide on their own if they want to take that next step to self discovery when they are good and ready. Best of luck. Xxx


I understand wanting to have an open and healthy discussion and relationship to sex but it’s definitely not the norm, I truly think starting off the conversation and showing openness before giving them a gift card and telling them to get a vibrator may be better. I mean, give them a gift card for whatever they want to buy with it

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Have the talk, explain, then drive them to a sex store and give them $ to shop themselves.

Buying them a vibrator is a little weird…if they want one they’ll get themselves one. Trust me.


I think that’s a conversation they have with their boyfriends as they experiment :joy::joy::joy:

While I think it’s weird to offer them a vibrator like that, maybe just have the open discussion with them about masturbation and how you don’t want them to feel ashamed. Yes, they will most likely be embarrassed but this is something that obviously you feel like needs to be said, so have the discussion.

Most people have said it’s weird. Maybe they are referring to the gift card. But hey, it’s your kids and how you want to raise them is how you raise them. Talking to your kids and telling them sex and masturbation is normal, is not weird though, and should be done more so kids don’t feel ashamed for normal feelings.


I wish my mother did this for me! I dont see anything wrong with it! My mother never even had a sex talk with me when i was a teen which led to me doing some questionable and unsafe things. Please educate them on safe sex and masturbation!


Yeah definitely weird. Way over stepping here.


I grew up in a house where my mother and I had a good relationship and talked about sex, marriage Ext. My mother was very open. However if my mother bought me a vibrator I would of been appalled. That’s more of an adult thing then a teenage thing. And if there into that, as some are not they will do that on there own when there ready.


I talked to my girls about learning and exploring their own bodies but thats enough in my opinion. Teaching about sex and self pleasure does not cause pregnancy, Quite the opposite actually. Education is power!

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Okay no, I understand you’re trying to be nice but that would be extremely awkward and just weird. It’s weird to think of your kids doing that imo. I would really just talk to them together. Just bring it up and take it on all at once. Inform them about being safe, discuss birth control, and tell them that it’s okay to be curious about themselves & it’s okay to ask you questions if they have any!! Do not buy them vibrators lmao


If they are older teens then they probably already know, I’m sure they’ve had lessons in school, heard all about it from their friends, and read about it online. I wouldn’t worry too much about talking about the details if it makes you uncomfortable, maybe just a lesson on contraceptives/sexual health and consent.