My 3-year-old doesn't listen: Advice?

I seriously need help with disciplining my three year old. She WILL NOT listen to anything. She will just constantly scream her head off, throw things, hit, kick, and just scream no at me. I’ve tried calmly talking to her, yelling, spanking, time outs, taking toys away, everything, and NOTHING works. I’m 26 weeks pregnant and high risk, which I know she doesn’t understand that, but she’ll hit or kick my stomach. She’s in preschool, and we thought it would help, but it’s not. She’s doing good there; just when she’s home, or we take her anywhere she acts like this. I can’t handle it. I love my daughter to death, but this has gotten outrageous. I don’t know what to do anymore. All of this started when she turned one and has just slowly gotten worse. She’s absolutely amazing when she wants to be, but that’s become rare. Any advice on what I can do? Or how to correct this? I will admit, she’s spoiled. She’s the first baby on mine, her father and my boyfriend’s side. But, she used to listen to me and do what she was told/asked without screaming and kicking. Nothing will calm her or please her anymore. I’m at a dead-end it feels like…


Following: my 4 yr old who’s in all day head start has acted the same since 2.

Stop spoiling her and be constant with her punishments for not listening.


My daughter was the same way and slowly got better when she reached 5 and had since improved. Nothing we did ever worked but I guess what we do now when she misbehaves is just take things away, ignore her, talk to her calmly, and she sees a therapist at school.

My son used to be this way and the only thing that has helped is being consistent. Time out and tv taken away, NO MATTER WHAT DONT GIVE IN. If she sits in time out screaming for 20 minutes… that’s her fault. She will learn. And once she stops then you can explain to her what just happened. You absolutely HAVE TO BE CONSISTENT or it will not work.


I’m really not trying to be a smartass, but maybe the child being in timeout or put in their rooms wont help the behavior, but it sure can give a Momma a break to get her shit together before dealing with them again…from a Mother of 4, Grandma of 2

Maybe talk with her doctor to see if there are any specialists that deal with these types of things. Maybe there’s some counseling sessions you guys could go to?

I’m so sorry this is happening to you… I feel even worse I dont have the answer. Mine just turned 2 and I find that not being consistent with consequences back fires big time

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I have not tried this yet but I’ve heard if when they do all those things you don’t acknowledge it whatsoever… when they see that you’re not giving your attention to when they throw these tantrums they’ll stop


You need to be consistent. Every. Single. Time. I would talk twice then tell her if I have to say it a 3rd time, she won’t like it. If she continues, DO SOMETHING! Just do the same thing every time.
Also look at the times of day this is happening. Regular sleep and eating habits are important. Is she hangry?
When I hear people say they’ve tried everything, I usually think they have not picked one thing and stuck with it. Good luck!


My daughter was in the phase and still has her moments like any kid. I learned that talking to her and when she throws a fit I completely ignore it. I don’t look her way absolutely nothing. I calmly stare “when you decide to calm down we can talk” this happened a few times and now she’s learned she’s put in time out throws her fit calms herself down and then we talk about it. She’s 3 and she will test me but they need to be taught how to handle their feelings. They won’t be perfect bc again, the world is so big and they don’t know exactly how to articulate what they are feeling. We still have her moments but this has been something that helps. I want and hope she learns that she is the o my one who can change her attitude… which is something even most adults can figure out.

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I Don’t have Any Children. I would Suggest Professional Help. I would also Do it Now, while She is Young. The Longer You Wait, the more Difficult it will be. XO!

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Sounds like my 1 year old :weary:

If she can do it at school she can do it at home. She’s playing you!


Time out. Put her in her room to think about it. Slap her hand and say dont kick.

Life is ruff , even on little ones some times. My great nephew went thru this. Was so ugly…but he out grew this and is now the sweetest little guy , he’ll be 3 in 4 months.

I’d recommend play therapy it helped my daughter tremendously with her behavioral problems

Ignore it. Move on. And ignore her shell get the point and just take her things away. When she calms doen explain why you took them away. Do not talk to her or amytbing in her rage.

Ignore her it’s hard to do but effective or remove her to safe area and let her scream she will get tired of it if no one is listening.

Is her bad behavior getting an uptick at home when the new baby is mentioned? Has she been included in the nursery picking out baby things, etc. There are great books to read to her her about becoming a big sister. Maybe an immediate consequences sticker chart? Spaces for completing 3 meals, using the potty, listing, picking up toys. When she reaches a goal you both agree on how many stickers she gets a dollar store prize or an activity away from home.

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