My 4 year old has been having accidents: Advice?

I need help, I have a 4-year-old daughter who is potty trained, but recently she has been pooping on herself; she’ll go to the restroom after she pooped on herself already, Idk what to do! Her dad thinks it’s okay to put a diaper on her, and if she poops to just leave her, but obviously, I’m not okay with that! I’ve left underwear on her, and I’ve talked to her about it, and she still poops on herself! she’s about to be 5 in June


Go back to the basics asking her and taking her every 30mins to an hr to go potty so she can know you’re going with her. Maybe she doesn’t want to go alone. Tell her to tell you when its time to go potty so you can go with her. Some kids don’t want to do that alone.

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Some kids take longer than others it’s not a bad thing

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If she’s potty trained, and this is recent, I’d contact her pediatrician.


Talk to your doctor forsure!!

If she is having bowel troubles such as constipation it happens. My son is 9 and sufferd from severe constipation and still has accidents. The doctor told me it’s leakage and they can not control it.


If she is already potty trained and she is starting this again, I say she needs a trip to the pediatrician

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My daughter did the same. I just kept talking to her and hoped that at 4 yrs old she will get it. She is 5 now and I have not seen any accidents but she did thought that it was funny to poop in her pull ups and that it’s a diaper and she wants to be a baby again. I found that especially when she is playing and enjoying what she was doing she would rather poop in her pull ups than run to the bathroom.

Any changes new baby is she in school daycare maybe she doesn’t want to be there if she’s doing them there but you still need to keep talking

All these things, but I’d also make sure there’s no chance she’s being abused because that is a symptom. I hope it’s not and doubt it is, but I think you should know that…


Encopresis is very common at that age. Get diagnose from a doctor. Can be an easy fix if caught quick. ( Severe constipation that may need medication in the process of retraining her on the toliet. It causes a big ball of poop she isn’t able to pass which causes leakage she wouldn’t feel or be able to control. If she’s sitting on toliet and actually pooping, on herself probably more so of a behavioral thing)
Lots of water and anything she may like to eat that helps with constipation until you get into the doctor and are instructed to take any laxatives or medication to help speed up bowel movements with help.
Good luck!

Make her clean her underwear out. I ruled out medical conditions and learned its control and my son also didnt want to miss anything so i made him wash out his underwear he only had to do it 2 times zero accidents since.

Pooping is usually the hard part when it comes to potty training.

Make her clean her own underwear or a cold shower. Either one is going to make them cry n scream but she will learn


first, take her to dr to ensure there isn’t something wrong with her. if there is nothing wrong, then i would go back to the basics of potty training. part of this is work on your part to ensure she goes to the bathroom every whatever interval you decide. i would not resort to shaming the child, making them clean up their own mess, etc.

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My son had encoprisis, I never heard of it but maybe look into that. He didn’t know he was even doing it until he had already done it. The doctor was amazing with helping me teach him WHEN to go to sit on the potty (after meals especially for a certain amount of time). He told me do not punish because he can’t help it. He would get so constipated it literally would solidify. So when he play it would just come out. I was like but he poops, how is he constipated. He says it’s actually what’s around the ball of mass (poop) that’s still in there coming out and he doesn’t have an urge to go or feel it.

My son did the same thing when he was that age. The doctor said that he would get busy playing or something and ignore the feelings until it was too late. I started asking him if he needed to go potty frequently and that helped but he mainly outgrew it

Maybe change in her daily schedule? Maybe she’s having stomach problems and can’t hold it. Hang in there! I’m sure it’s just a temporary issue. Just have her try to use the restroom a little more.

could be several things…Is she looking forward to going to kindergarten? Tell her she can’t go to kindergarten if she can’t make it to the bathroom …see if things change…if not Has anything big changed in the household or daily routine? Any remote chance she’s been sexually abused?

I got my kids a potty book when they were “poop training”. I had to make sure they were made to take plenty of potty breaks, and to ensure they took time to try to poop, the books really helped. I used Elmo’s Potty Time and other Elmo potty books.