My boyfriend and I are splitting up due to his family: What do I do?

So I’m in a situation I never thought nor wanted to be in. I & my sons father are splitting up over some b.s. That his family started w me, basically, he doesn’t back me up & expects me just to let them walk all over me & won’t put them in their place when it comes to our family. His mom wants control over everything, even the decisions we make regarding our son. & he allows it, allows her to always get her way bc it’s her way or no way. Anyways, I’m not gonna have him tell me that I cause all the problems when I know I don’t, so I’m just leaving. They tried to physically fight me at my son’s 1st birthday party & yet I’m the bad guy. I’ve told my bf & my mil that she will not be seeing him for a while bc what she did in front of my son was totally uncalled for. But as u can guess, I’m just “using my son” as a way to get back at her. She has also been high on pills around my son. She’s never alone w him though & when I notice she is high we don’t visit long & he stays right by my side. Well, I express my concerns w my bf & he just makes excuses for her saying it’s her medicine that makes her nod off, slur her words & basically just act like a zombie. Either way, I don’t want my son exposed to that & nobody can see my point of view on that. Not to mention that I know she will talk down on me to my son if I’m not around. I’ve caught her doing it before when she didn’t think I could hear her. I appreciate he can’t understand now, but my whole concern is how do I get over the fact that he’s going to be seeing her without me around. I know that when we make our split final, after I move all my things, he’s gonna want to take him to see them & I’m not gonna lie. It’s going to bother me so much. I’ve never even been away from him since he’s been born, so I’m going to be upset that he won’t be with me & upset that I’m not gonna know what’s going to be happening around my son.

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Your other half needs to grow up first of all bc once people start bringing children into this world no longer are either family first. Your children and spouse are first

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Get you a lawyer, your kid doesn’t need to be around a drug head. I’m sure the courts will give you full custody.

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Go to court and file for custody and child support because if you don’t he could take him for visitation and not give him back till theirs a court order in place

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Divorce that momma boy!

When you go to court for custody, bring up grandma’s drug habit and the parental alienation they’ve been starting. A judge will take all that into consideration.

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You could go for visits under supervision.

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Restraining order/court order saying he can’t be around them… make sure u have proof tho

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Don’t let your son go with him if you know he’ll be around that. Your right 100%… is run and leave skid marks. Your a great mom for protecting your son from that environment and getting away from that childish mommas boy

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Just my opinion but until you have a court order I would not let him see your son without you being present.If his mom is that manipulative then she could get him to keep him and there would be nothing you could do about it without a court order.

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I left my husband for a year because his mom was like this… Told my 3 year old daughter (step) if I spanked her again mawmaw was gonna whoop my a**. She would come in my house and just walk in, would go in my fridge and give the kids snacks constantly while I was cooking. Told my husband I killed her cat. Said I snuck into her house and broke her oven up. Told my husband I wouldnt be back until he could quit being a mommas boy and take up for me (wife) because I choose to be with him. Took a year but now we are back together. Have been for about 5 years!! Our 7 year wedding anniversary is this November!! And we now have a beautiful 7 month old baby to go along with our 11 year old daughter!! Me and his mom get along now… But it took some heart ache…

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Talk to a lawyer or counselor, possibly see if you can record what is happening or save texts, so that you gave proof of what is happening.

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You leaving may make him grow up. If not you still made the right decision. If you go for custody abd hes granted 50/50 you wknt have much say in what happens when baby isnt with you unless its on paper before hand.

I agree with everyone. You can’t leave him with drug abusers. And you know he will leave your child with her. Especially if he works. It’s a toxic relationship and you have to stand up for yourself and protect your son. Good luck.

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These kids nowadays are always put in situations they shouldn’t be if you guys split then a contract needs to be made that if he gets the child for a day or two the child cannot be around his mother the contract needs to be signed by the boat of used and notarized and if he breaks it do not allow your son to go with him anymore or do supervised visits

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Was the police called as for the birthday party? If so get copies of the police report to back up why you don’t want the baby around Grandma. It will be she said he said if you bring up her pill addiction. Don’t dwell on it bc you don’t want the judge thinking its all about the Grandma.

Unless he’s staying at her house then YES bring the party/pill problem up.

You are doing the right thing for you and your son.
Get a lawyer

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Make sure when you go to your custody hearing you tell the judge al of this!

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Get a restraining order on them all. There is no excuse to have violence around a child, that’s child endangerment. The drugs, I definitely wouldnt allow my child around someone who is slurring or nodding off cause your child will notice that and think its okay. Its totally not. Restraining order and NOW

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Ask for a court order she is not to he around your child unless you supervise. Require drug tests. I know she is on medication but she should only be on it when NOT with baby. If ask for supervised visits on everyone especially since it got physical.