My boyfriend call his ex after an argument to vent: Advice?

I have been dating my boyfriend for a year. Both are us come from 12 plus year marriages. He has children, and so do I. This weekend, we moved in together and got into our first big blow out ( no kids where home. It was their weekend with the other parent) he slapped a family member on the butt ?! To me, that seems inappropriate! And it’s happened before, and I’ve expressed my opinion! Things got pretty heated, but we eventually calmed down and went to separate rooms for the night. We’ll come to find out he called and told his ex-wife about our argument Saturday night and spoke to her about the situation on Saturday night while I was in our room! Am I right to be upset I believe when you have problems, you should keep it in the relationship and not open doors to others? I could really use some opinions and thoughts on the matter. It’s not that I’m jealous at all. I really like his ex-wife, and we have a great relationship. I just feel betrayed. He talked to her about our problems, and it makes us look unstable ?! Thoughts? How should I resolve this? I almost feel like it’s toxic and should end things now before I end up getting hurt down the line?

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If hes going to his ex wife for comfort then thats bad news…

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Yea I wouldn’t like that

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He can talk to who ever he wants don’t like it? Leave him.

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Sounds like your gut is telling you what to do already. But if you choose to stay create solid boundaries and refuse to cross them. If he does again leave. But life is too short to be unhappy.

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You leave your ex for a reason. No way would I put up with that! If you need to vent to someone call a friend or family member.

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that is called an emotional affair when they talk to their exes

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you have been overlooking this behavior and now your living with it. Run. Fast.

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Yes you’re relationship should stay between you. Even if he absolutely needed to vent, a member of the opposite sex, especially an ex, should never be the one to vent to. Period.

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Tbh I would be mad he didnt talk to you about it but he is also entitled to hsve a friend who isnt u to vent sbout ur issues to. Doesnt mean anything is going on.

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Sounds like you already know what to do. What else does he run to his ex for? Good luck

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Wait did he slap one of your female family members on the butt?

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Slapping someone’s behind would anger me but running to ex for comfort would have me packing his crap. That means there is still something there.

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Partner talks to ex… You talk to thousands on a public platform?

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Yeah sounds like hes still attached to his ex wife dont get me wrong im still friends with some of my exs but i would NEVER run to them.with relationship problems thats a BIG no no in my book nuh uh my boyfriend is friends with his ex and thats fine with me shes cool but he wouldnt run to her with his relationship problems and he knows better id run girl unless you want his ex to know all of your relationship problems like ALL of them js

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Ppl. Yall cant compare social media to an ex he was intimate with. :roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes: anyways, no good. Means hes still comfortable with her. Put her and him in their places if u plan on stickin together. And make it MF clear that him slappin asses is a huge no for you. Point blank period.

Imma be the odd one here. But me and my ex husband are now great friends. We co parent great and we both vent to each other about our relationship problems. Mostly its because we know how to calm each other down when we’re not mad at each other and also we have no problem telling the other when there being stupid. Both of our SOs no we call and talk to each other all the time and my exes girl loves it cause he’s being told he’s being dumb alot. Lmfao. But it works for us. Maybe talk to him and see what his reasoning is

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You’ve been together for a year and only one fight? Who was the family member? And no he should not be venting your problems to his ex, been there done that.

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Let me play devil’s advocate here. Sometimes our ex’s know us better than anyone else. If I know I’m wrong but I don’t wanna face it, I’ll call my ex-husband and tell him what happened. He owes me nothing and will be honest with me. Tell me that I’m acting like an ass and get it together. Not all ex’s wanna see you unstable and can help out in these situations. If it’s a healthy situation, your ex is gonna want to see you happy because otherwise it affects the kids.

I 100% thinks is wrong to talk to your ex about these things! I never would. My bf also talks to his ex about this type of stuff and I don’t think it is appropriate at all. And It hasn’t changed for 10 yrs. So if it’s an issue for u , I suggest you leave because it won’t change.

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