My child lives with me but I still pay child support: Advice?

Parenting
#1
My daughter is 17 and is a junior in high school. I just went to court with her mother in December for child support. We established 50/50, and now there is no child support on my end. But I am paying a monthly back child support which is so much less than I was paying. One month later, her mother moved out of the country with her three kids and husband. My daughter and I knew this was going to happen, but the mom didn’t want to say anything when we went to court because she assumed she would have to pay me child support and didn’t want to agree to extinguish the back child support. It’s less than two grand at this point. I went along with it because I knew that I would end up getting my daughter full time and I was excited about that. I’ve basically had her full-time since last August, a dream my daughter and I thought would never happen. Now, I’m just frustrated because I’m thinking about how I’m still paying her mom monthly, and she’s not even here. I actually don’t want any child support from her, but I think she should give up the back child support. I have my daughter full-time now through the end of next year when she graduates high school. Should I contact the court and let them know that it’s actually not 50/50? That she left the country?! Or just deal with it? My daughter will tell me sometimes that her mom wants me to send her extra money, and it confuses me since she’s not even here.
49 Likes
#2

That doesn’t seem right. Maybe get it revisited?

#3

I would notify the courts for sure. That money isn’t going to anyone but mom now. Idk if they will do anything but I think it needs to be reported.

8 Likes
#4

Tell the court. That’s her legal obligation to keep the court updated with her address and any changes in the minor’s living situation. Since she is being shady and hasn’t done that then you absolutely need to.

7 Likes
#5

Tell the court, and i wouldn’t pay her you have the daughter give it to her instead. Your paying :woman_shrugging:t2:

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#6

You would likely still have to pay the back support, but the court may also grant you an order to receive child support. I’m not sure how they would enforce that however with her living out of the country.

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#7

Let the courts know that she moved and you have your child.

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#8

My ex owed arrearages. Alot!!! When my son moved in with him just before his 17th birthday, the judge ordered a chunk of the arrearage be knocked off in exchange for my obligation to him. I didnt physically pay, only agreed to reduce back payments owed. Funny thing is, he was so far behind. He payed me monthly payments until my son was 21, and thats after knocking off 13k off his debt for my support of my son till he was 18.

1 Like
#9

Cannot receive child support from over seas parent . U also should contact Ird and tell them
She’s in ur care full time and have them bill her don’t feel bad .
I raise 4 kids with no child support

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#10

You need to inform the court that she’s left the country. At this point you should notify them on the off chance something comes up at a later date with your daughter, or the monetary aspects like taxes.
And while you might not want to pursue child support, and that’s fine, you should still get credit against your remaining balance for being her sole provider.

7 Likes
#11

Take her back to court and let the court know that she left without telling courts

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#12

Contact the courts. Tell them she moved.

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#13

You notify the courts.

#14

Yes notify the courts!!!

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#15

Go back to court for sure!

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#16

It’s back support. That means you fell behind when she had custody, therefore you owe it. Having custody now doesn’t change the fact.

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#17

Yes notify the courts and let them know what is going on so you don’t have to pay.

2 Likes
#18

Ok, this amount is from before, which means you still owe it no matter who has the child now.

6 Likes
#19

That’s back pay something you owed from the past

1 Like
#20

It’s back pay. Nothing u can do about that.