I’ve been a working single mum for ten years who has somehow managed to stay in my own home. After okaying it with my 18 yo daughter, my partner of 2 years moved in late last year, which was very welcomed financially. Around the same time, my daughter met first boyfriend, 19, who, against my wishes, started staying overnight all the time. Both were not working or helping financially or otherwise around the house. This created problems in my relationship because my partner could not stand for it and felt gagged by me, so he moved out just prior to covid-19 to save our relationship. Since then I have been responsible for both my daughter and her boyfriend who have lived with me fulltime. They said he couldn’t stay with his dad who is in covid isolation due to health issues. After continually asking for help they said he can’t get centrelink assistance because his parents earn too much. Finally a month ago they both found work. My daughter part time and the boyfriend mostly full time but still have not given me any help. I’m feeling more and more resentful and every time I bring it up my daughter it ends in a massive argument. I am not wealthy and owe a lot on credit and can’t believe this has become my issue to support them both. I then told her I want him moved out by next weekend. She said she will go with him. I said that is your choice. Now she says he’ll go home and she’ll be on streets and even her own mother doesn’t want her. I feel I’ve been incredibly generous and patient not a toxic uncaring mother but the guilt is still there. How much do you have to do for your 18 yo?
Shes a big girl tell her go find a full time job and give u 100 a week or get out. Shes no longer your responabilitie.shes an adult and its time she learns life isnt free and that includes your parents home as well.
Honestly my parents made me and my sister the same offer when we turned 18. You either pay 1 bill a month and help with groceries or you get out. It wasn’t a hard decision. I love my parents to death but I couldn’t stand living with them. Me and my husband (who was my boyfriend at the time) moved into our own place and have been here for 3 years. My sister stayed with my parents until she got married and moved out. Honestly I think a little tough love is what everyone needs. I know that if I needed help my mom would help me. But she gave us the push we needed.
Um you fucked up by letting him stay over in the first place. Be a parent.
Kick both of them out smh
Stand your ground. Your kicking him out not her, she is throwing a tantrum. Stand your ground, it’s a lesson they both obviously need to learn.
My bf, I and recent new baby just moved back in with parents due to my dads health issue and the previous situation we were I wasn’t healthy! I’m 25 and he is 30. He was working full time but now only COVID is only working part time. But we still pay my parents, 150 a month, on top of whatever grocery they need or if they need more money for bills! We don’t expect anything to be just handed to us! We are currently looking for a place to live! Don’t let them walk all over you!
Hold your ground!
Evict her if you have to do it
Don’t allow her to manipulate your feelings!
They are wanting to live like adults, so let them.
Write out a rental agreement, and I would include behavior expectations as well.
It’s high time you be the landlord and treat them as tenants.
When I was sixteen, out of school and had a CASUAL job, I was paying my way when I lived with my dad. I was paying 200 a fortnight for rent, utilities and food (also fuel money to get me to and from train station at late/early times). I also wasn’t on centrelink. If I knew I didn’t have potential work for a while, I’d pay my dad ahead of time. It’s about responsibility and I think at 18, it’s reasonable for you to ask her to have some
Read the last line 18 yr old aka adult who’s been manipulating you for far too long cut the cord leave her find her feet
Time for her to grow up
One paid electric, one paid water, no where would they find rent at that price. Dont allow her to guilt trip you, you aren’t doing her any favors. Now HE needs to get out. No money, no honey, they cant afford to be in a relationship.
Pay rent or move out
Kick his grown ass out.
They help pay rent and food or they find other accomodation. Give them 3 weeks to decide. They are adults and adults pay rent and food as well as bills.
Our children should come before any man but yeah it wouldn’t harm her to pay her way if she can afford abit X
Tough love momma. You have been raising her, it’s time to grow up! She is 18.
i made my kids pay me $150 a week as soon as they finished school
Make rules and she either follows them or she is out! Tough love.