I found out I was pregnant by my daughter’s father in August of 2019; prior to that, he was talking to another female at the same time he was me, and after I found I was pregnant, we had found out from a mutual friend she was too. At that point in time, he had messaged her asking questions, and she told him to “not worry about it, to leave it alone bc they’re another guy” so as she said, he left it alone. However, those babies she had (twins) are now nine months old. We have recently run into this girl at a baby shower of a mutual friend, and she didn’t say a word, his parents ran into her Sunday at her job, and she spoke up to tell them she had twins and offered a picture to show them. HOWEVER did not say anything about them possibly being his or even mentioned his name. He found out today from his mother about that situation. I am curious to know what i should do, or what anyone else would do in the situation?? I feel as tho if he was to contact her himself to pursue a DNA test and they came out to be his our relationship would be over, and I also feel as tho if she cared about those kids having a father she wouldn’t have told him to leave it alone in the beginning or even let it go this long she would have taken it upon herself to speak up if she felt the need to. Would you stay with your man in this situation? Would you encourage him to reach out? Or would you encourage him to let it go like she has told him to in the very beginning? Please give me your opinions!!
I mean you KNEW he was talking to other people at that time you can’t really be mad about it
Why would your relationship be over? If they were just seeing eachother before you guys made it official then I can only see it as a blessing? It would be hard but, if you love eachother you’ll work through it. I’d encourage him to find out the truth, just for peace of mind above all else, and not have anyone be able to say my partner doesn’t care for his children.
I would encourage to gain a relationship an stay with him. It was a known possability.
So this girl says someone else is the father and she’s not asking for a paternity test… why would your bf pursue one? Do the kids look like him??
It is between the two of them, and it appears that she does not want any legal ties to him regarding them. Why start drama that isn’t there?
He was talking to u both well u saying talking you dont get two people pregnant by talking to them personally id have cut contact, anyway you new the risks and stayed with him you cant end it cause now he might have 9month old twins you sound jealous
Those are possibly his children…he should definitely find out and step up! Who cares if she said no need! Kids deserve both parents! And if your going to leave him for being a parent and taking responsibility you need to reevaluate your priorities.
August 2019 was only 4 months ago if y’all both found out you were pregnant at that time how are the twins now 9 months old anyway he should definitely pursue DNA test and be in all his children’s lives they didn’t ask to born in the situation
If they are his, he has a financial obligation to support them.
She says they aren’t his. She doesn’t want him. He’s okay with this. You need to come to terms with this.
The relationship should probably be over anyways. He was screwing around with both of y’all.
Why are women so insecure to stay in these BS positions? First off, I’d never stay with someone that had a baby with me and someone else at the same time, regardless of the DNA results. Clearly he was screwing you and someone else raw back to back. Two I wouldn’t want to be with someone that knew a child could be his, but did nothing about it. Quit enabling these bum dudes.
She said leave it alone. So i dont understand why you are asking for advice about it if she made it clear she was fine without him. Just leave her alone. If he wants to be in their lives you can stay in his too. its not a choice between you and her.
i would not stay with him she can have him but i would put him on child support
It’s really not about you at all
It’s between him, her, and those babies when they get older
Seems kind of stupid that you’d end your relationship over him having other kids though…
Wait so you knew he was talking to someone else at the same time but if the babies are his it’s a possible deal breaker for you? That’s kinda messed up in my opinion. I’d encourage him to reach out even to just let her know that if she doesn’t want him apart of their lives he can respect that but if there’s a chance they are his that he’d like to do a paternity test for biological reasons. Would i stay with him in this situation? Of course I’d stay with him if I loved him since I chose to sleep with him in a non committed relationship.
The better question is what does he want to do? Does he want to leave it alone or pursue it? Is this all just because it’s bothering you?
If he knows he may possibly have kids and does nothing to step up…who is to stay he will step up to your kid…irresponsible
Sounds like you want out of this relationship and this would make it easier for you.
I’m confused as to how she found out she was pregnant in August of 2019 and already had them and they are 9 months old ? She’s only be like 4 or 5 months pregnant with the twins?