My ex doesn't help with our child and I am honestly exhausted: Advice?

I have 2 children with the same father but one has cerebral palsy and does not get acknowledged. We have 50/50 of our 10 year old son but our 8 year old daughter stays with me full time. She is not discussed or asked about even if she is in the vehicle during pick up/drop off. He was paying $100 a month (agreed upon through court) but started to complain so I said forget it and took him off child support. I have nurses that come to help first shift but he doesn’t understand how incredibly difficult it is when night shift calls off all the time. I struggle with asking for help. My parents already helped for years. My husband helps but he and I are both tired we are downright stupid. I literally went to the kitchen to grab him a banana and came back with dish soap. I’m almost concerned. The agency swears they have no nurses to cover if one calls off. I asked my husband about working only part time but he wants to work full time. Financially we would be ok with him cutting back his hrs. I love my daughter. But I’m losing sleep and my mind especially since COVID-19 and homeschooling. I am starting counseling this week but that can only help so much. Suggestions? I’m miserable and moody. Even my kids and husband say so.


Sounds like you are just letting him have his way. Take him back for child support for one and then some kind of legal obligation to help with her care . Just as he does with the other child.


You need help, and you shouldnt be afraid to ask for help… Get the help you need…

Get him back on child support. End of discussion.


I’d take the father back to court for support, and look into some other service to help when call off happen or when you just need a break. Unfortunately courts can’t force her father to take her too…but applause to your husband for being a stand up guy and helping you and your children when it clearly isn’t the easiest situation, love hearing about Real Men!!!


You can contact your case manager or specialist and let them know that the agency you are using keeps calling off and saying they have nobody to cover the shift and they can look into a different nursing agency in/on your insurance/network!! I wish you the Very Best of Luck!! You are doing an Amazing Job mama, Keep your head up!!


Fuck that. Take her dad back to court and make him pay. $100/month isn’t much at all and don’t let him tell you otherwise. He’s her father too and has responsibilities to take care of her. Make him do as much as possible via the courts


You shouldn’t have taken him off child support. It would have helped with the time off work.


No way… Get your child support back! He is a dead beat Dad and even though you shouldn’t have to make him be an active parent, you’re allowing him to not be and even enabling him. Like taking back the child support because he throws a fit about having to pay for it. Also, maybe find a different agency to help. If they’re calling off as much as it seems… Then they aren’t doing their duties either. My heart goes out to you and your family are in my prayers! But please incredible, beautiful, strong woman and momma… Stop taking his shit and excuses. And call him on it! To his face and in court. And don’t allow that agency to fail you anymore! They get paid to do their job and aren’t doing all of it. Kind of like your ex husband. You’re clearly a strong hardworking amazing momma. But you are human and can’t take it all on by yourself! My only question is, have you point blank asked him why doesn’t want a relationship with your daughter? And next time you go do drop off or pick up… I would be like " Your daughter is in the car and would love to see you" … Keep being so amazing and know that you are worthy and in a lot of people’s prayers!

Take him back to court. Who cares if he complains about paying. Why is the custody agreement just for one child. It sounds like he needs to learn a little responsibility when it comes to both of your children.


No, you bitch up and take him back to court. He needs to be a man.


Idk what state you are in but when I went to court we both filed I filed for both kids he filed for just our son! The judge told him it’s either both kids or no kids :woman_shrugging:t3:

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Now why would you take him off child support and give him what he wants? That’s going to look bad in court once you go back. Don’t do that again, instead ask for more money wtf. $100 doesn’t even cover anything with a child that has conditions. You need to stop letting him slide and have him pay up more money since he don’t want to help physically. I don’t know where you live, but that’s way too little. I know people that make 20k and pay $500 for one child.

Why are you letting their sperm donor off the hook? $100 a month isn’t anything. My husband pays that for just one child every week. Don’t let him skate on his responsibilities. He help make them, he should have to help support them. Especially since he wants to be a jerk and not even ask about his daughter.

100$ a month? You dropped child support? You have medical bills? I’d be getti g more out of him. Have him get another job! POS doesn’t want to spend time w his daughter He’s whining and your letting him get away with it. You get back in court you go for child surport!!


Yeah Im confused as to why you would take him off child support get him back on there!


The guys a douchebag. $100 for two kids and one disabled is a joke. Call him on that bullshit. Quit letting these idiots walk all over you. Stand up for yourself.


Put him on child support who cares if he complains he ignores one of his children because of a disability? Outrageous

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Can’t you go back to court and ask that he help pay for extra help?

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Get his money or his freedom seeing you don’t have much of either… why should he,??