My ex doesn't take the kids at the same time: Thoughts?

My ex wants to talk to me about taking our older child and having him live with him all the time to help me out when I have my baby with my current SO. My ex and I haven’t been together in 5 years. He hasn’t been around much in the last year to watch his kids while I’m at work, my grandma has them both all the time when I’m at work. He bails on her multiple times without talking to her. He rarely takes them together its always one or the other, mostly the older one. He doesn’t help me financially with either of them, and I have them 24/7. We do not have a custody agreement, and I’m seriously contemplating taking him to court. Should I discuss this with him and tell him how I feel about him wanting just one kid?


Should be taking both kids at the same time… I kno I would and that’s coming from a dad


If there is no custody agreement then he can take them and not give them back until after your court date is finalized and not sure how long things can be dragged out. I think if he wants more time with them that is great but both of them but always cover yourself and the children so they do not get caught up in anymore craziness than the have to.


That sounds fishy. He only wants them one at a time. Doesn’t sound right at all. Don’t leave the kids with him until you have a custody agreement. And let him know, he takes both children or none at all. I still find it very odd though that he only wants to take one at a time. Something doesn’t sound right there.


Why doesnt he just take them both and do 50/50

No, just take it to court. No need to hash it out before you inevitably take that route anyway.


Wow why would you force 2 kids on him if he could not cope with it ? You want the kids to suffer to prove your point I don’t get it


Why would you even consider?? Knowing he is NOT stepping up now as a dad!!! There’s no way I could split my kids, just to have life easier on me.
Strap them boots up and get shot done Mama!!!


Don’t let them go anywhere with him unless it’s been finalized through court or you just might lose them altogether cause he can do what ever he wants right now please I’ll be praying for y’all God Bless and good luck with them all dear​:pray::pray:


No take him to court,it protects your and his rights

First of all Emily I dont see where you think this is funny. :roll_eyes: Grow up.
Second girl he should he taking both his kids, because your youngest is gonna grow up thinking daddy is playing favorites with him and the older sibling and that’s obviously not fair. If he can care for one he can care for the other as well.

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I couldn’t do that, I wouldn’t want my kids thinking they are getting pushed to the back burner because of having a new baby, especially if the father hasn’t been present for the majority of the time. This would Be out of the question, personally I would want my older kids to be involved in their siblings life from the start.


Um i would have a court ordered agreement. And document all the missed visits. There is nothing set so doesn’t stop him from just picking kids up nkt returning them.


Personally I would only allow him to have visitation however only after court papers.

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I wouldnt tell him just do it


I’d just go ahead and take him to court for a custody agreement.

Don’t even tell him.

Lotta words yet- nobody knows what you’re talking about.

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What do you need Him for

My ex tried that to.he not around much he just wanted the child tax for himself it just him probably being money hungry if he wanted his child he would of stepped up and been the father proved himself but don’t sound like it how would he treat or raise ur son will he be father or just ignore him to