My ex is being spiteful and won't let my fiance pick my kids up from his house: What can I do?

I want you to post this please…I’m currently a SAHM and just recently got a job to work every other weekend while my other two girls are by their dads. Well, I filed for a review for child support because he won’t help with half of any expenses. I asked if he wanted school pictures, and he said yes he would pay half, now when it comes down to it, he won’t give me half. I’m just beyond sick of it. He sees the kids every other weekend because that’s his decision. Now he is all mad because I’m taking him back to the court that he won’t let a friend of mine or even my fiancé pick up our kids on Sundays that he has them. He is doing this because he knows that I won’t be able to work now. How do I get around this and have my friend or fiancé be able to pick up? We go to court the 29th, but I honestly will think the judge will have me make another court date for this alone. He is doing this out of spite!


You don’t have a current custody agreement?

File in court, my fiancé has had a issue with this aswell, she wouldn’t even allow me to come with him to pick up his daughter, I’m not only his fiancé but I’m the mother of his other children. He was so over it he filed a no contact order, his mother and his daughters mother only contact each other and his mom does pickup and drop off. Oh well :woman_shrugging:t2: can’t act like a a adult you’ll be treated like a child then.


Tell him that either he allows an alternative person to pick up or he won’t have then at all… your 2 grown ass adults tossing your kids in the middle (more him) but I get it. Either he gowns some balls and respects the arrangements or he just won’t have access.

Looks like your ex will have to have them until you get off work Sundays then I guess. If he can’t handle having them longer then he’ll have to let someone else pick them up for you.


As for money. It should always be court ordered. Can he just drop the kids off. My ex always has dropped my kids off. We have generally never used anyone else


The only thing you can do is get it in writing however they are your children not your fiance’s. ND unless you arent legally allowed to drive they don’t normally allow anyone else to do pick ups. At least where I live

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Is many states you can put in the custody papers that certain people are allowed to pick up the children in your place…especially if it’s because it interferes with your work schedule. Just talk to your attorney.


Court u need to get it approved that ur finacee is picking them uo when u cant. If its court approved he has too.

Also get court approved that u get paid half of all money for child.

Take recites like school pictures , school cloths, school snacks, lunches , school feild trips, insurance , doctor copays.

Have court order drop off at police station

If it’s your parenting time he doesn’t have a choice. Call the police if he won’t hand the kids over

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This happened to us. I was picking my stepdaughter up from day xare because I got off 2-3 hours before my husband. His X tried to make it a court order that i wasn’t allowed at the day care. The judge basically told her too bad so sad. People work. It’s life. If she wanted to pick her and drop her off each visit day then go for it. I picked her up on our day. I get the X’s not wanting the new man/woman around their kids but if it’s a long term relationship then it’s going to happen. Unless there are specific reasons. I’m in CA.

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You’ll have to get an attorney and have a formal custody and visitation order drawn up. There’s really no other way to go about it. The child support issue will be dealt with simultaneously as well. Until you have a court ordered custody/visitation schedule, both parents have equal rights to the kids and verbal agreements are simply unenforceable. GET AN ATTORNEY

Does the court papers say anything about who picks up the kids?

Im sure the current paperwork doesn’t say you have to be there to drop off and pick up…I would call the non emergency police number and ask them if your fiancée can call them if dad won’t release them, they should be able to direct you how to proceed

You can have anyone you want pick your kids up. Lol. As long as theres no court order to say otherwise. Just send them and have your man or friend d pick them up. If he has a problem with that then tell him ok well you can drop them off at home then. And if he doesn’t call the police.


Just bring it up in court to judge. You’ll be able to work

To modify the actual custody agreement, you’ll need a lawyer. For child support modifications, it’s easier through CSS. Just went through something similar. CSS judges can’t do anything regarding pickups or custody.

Regardless of custody, your not married ( not sure it matters) but he’s the father and my be a ass, but he don’t have to release his child to any one he don’t want to.

Anyone can drop off, or pick up the children. There’s no law in that, and he doesn’t have a say so in who picks up the children as long as there aren’t any restraining orders. Thats just a pill he has to swallow. Just send the friend, or SO to pick up the children. If he refuses to release the children, have the person call the cops and make a report, then, take that report to court showing proof of his behavior.