I am divorced with two kids. Their schools are currently closed from covid. I am working full time from home. My youngest is special needs and has multiple doctor appointments. My oldest had sports and extracurriculars. I work weekends. I am constantly driving my kids around and working (I work 10-8) and homeschooling. I am exhausted. My family is giving me a guilt trip for not driving another hour to take my kids to visit them. They have an open invitation to my home to see kids anytime but refuse to drive. How would you respond to the guilt trips? I am at my wit’s end and about to block their numbers because they just don’t get the stress I am under trying to juggle it all. Also, I only have my kids every other weekend as they go see their dad. Advice, please
If they wanna see them bad enough they will make the time. People can only make you feel guilty if you let them. If they dont have respect for u and ur schedule then they can kick rocks.
Hang up and don’t answer the phone. They’ll take the initiative to drive or not see them.
If they can’t drive to you, then to bad. I deal with the same issue. Always asked to drive places. Also told I never come over. Yet no one every even trys to come visit my children either. Started with my olders. As the oldest is 25. . Sweetheart due you. If they wanted to see them they would make the trip.
I wouldnt feel guilty. I would tell them all that u have to do and that u just don’t have the time. That maybe they should come to your house instead. And if they say well I can’t do that. Then be like okay cool well neither can I. See ya later.
If they want to see them so badly, they know where you live. Otherwise tell them you’ll bring them by to visit when you’re able and to stop nagging you about it.
You need to set boundaries for you and your family, and what is best for them. I have gone through this too and you need to let them have a tantrum about it and only worry about what makes your life easier.
They can drive to you. Don’t let them guilt you because they aren’t making time to come to you either.
I would just say we are too busy but you can come here. I’m not the only one who can drive to visit.
We quit running every time we had my stepson. If they want to see them they’ll go to the sporting events, extracurricular, or just come get them to give you a break.
Tell them that you’ve already explained your time constraints and you don’t want to hear anything else about it. Put your foot down and absolutely refuse to explain yourself anymore.
Explain your time constraints and that they need to come to you if they wish to see them. They’ll either take the hint and visit or wont
"Ur car works just fine u can make the drive too. If u dont wanna come c them that’s ur problem not mine… bye felicia "
I’d just keep the invitation open. If they don’t want to come and visit that’s on them. My bfs family doesn’t have any part in our sons life for this reason. They kept refusing to come over to visit insisting we go over there.
The road works both ways! Save the guilt trips. They are just as capable.
Ignore them. If they want to see them badly enough, they will come to you. You’re already dealing with a lot.
They can make the drive. You got enough on your plate.
Tell them that you are extremely busy and that of they want to see the kids they will have to find the time to come over … also … maybe they could take them for a weekend once in a while to give you a break …
Obviously if you share time with your kids ontop of that crazy schedule you are going to want to spend as much as yo free time with them home. So if your family can’t understand that I’d just stop answering them… if they can’t take the time from there day to do the drive what makes them assume you have the time… obviously those work hours aren’t a great time to be be visiting family so I would just let them no basically how you stepped it out to us. Don’t feel guilty at all… your a busy momma!! Good luck
Don’t feel guilty. If they really wanna see your kids they know where to find you. If they can’t understand you’re literally non stop working with your job and homeschooling the kids and driving them to appts etc etc then they don’t really want to be involved, they just want to make you feel bad for not taking the extra drive and time to them. Exactly what you said, they have an open invitation to your home. What more do they need?