My fiance and I are spliiting up how should I handle the parenting plan?

So my fiance and I have been together for four years and lately have been having problems. We are trying to work on things… My worry is if we split, how we would make parenting plan work. I don’t want to do it 50/50. Our baby girl is eight months. He ignores her so he can play games/ watch tv. He pawns her off on my family while I’m at work so he can have a break every day. He doesn’t feed her solids because he’s lazy. He only recently started giving her baths before bed, and that’s maybe once a week. He doesn’t read to her. And he has a temper, so he yells at the baby and calls her names and swears at her. Are these concerns valid? Should I bring these things up in court? I love him, and just because we might not make it work doesn’t mean I want to take his baby from him. I think he has the potential to change, but I’ve been trying to change those things since she was born. He doesn’t seem to want to change. He acts like she’s an inconvenience. Let me know what you think, Mommas . . Overreaction? Legitimate concerns? Or…?

37 Likes

Start writing everything down, video it as well if you are there when he is doing this. Can he even afford a lawyer?

7 Likes

He yells and swears at an 8 month old baby? I think you just answered your own question sweetie, he needs to be in the past and you need to nurture that baby girl of yours

21 Likes

Valid concerns! Document everything and bring it up in court. Facts work!

2 Likes

If he is cussing and calling an 8 month old names he shouldn’t be left alone with her PERIOD.

21 Likes

A man that can call his baby, any baby for that matter names isn’t a man at all. He doesn’t deserve your love or hers walk away now, and don’t leave him alone with her. God forbid he does something he could never take back.

4 Likes

Those are very valid concerned document conversation related to him yelling at the baby it record it and use it to get full custody he doesn’t take care of her properly now and that’s not going to change at all when you spilt I would ask for every other weekend or supervised visits depending on his anger issues and negelrct

You need to fucking leave

Get small cameras and place them in hidden places around the house then you have proof and gather people who have seen him acting badly

1 Like

Document everything ,supervised visitation child support he won’t change

2 Likes

She’s 8 months old. He shouldn’t be taking his anger out on an 8 MONTH OLD. Give him supervised visits at the most. Don’t push him to change and don’t give him anymore than that. He’ll change for her if he really wants to be a dad. If not, she’s not missing out on anything

6 Likes

If you are concerned enough to bring this to a forum of strangers, you are looking for validation. Do not leave him alone with your baby. You have to take your life back and make a better life for her. He cannot attend to her needs, it sounds like he’s not that mature from what you are telling us. I would go to Children and Family services, talk to a representative. They can point you in the right direction, document what you’ve said in case you need it at some point, maybe do some other services for you. Do not overreact with him, keep your cool. Remember that everything you say and do is being watched and can be used against you so you want to be the grown up in this for the safety of your little miracle.

2 Likes

You’ve just answered your own questions why you defending him? She’s a baby protect her!

5 Likes

I wouldn’t leave your child around him if he’s calling your baby names and stuff

4 Likes

Leave him. He’s too immature

You need to keep him away from this baby now this is abuse and can only get worse

Wow. I’m sooo glad to hear your splitting, I’m
Sorry to say that but he doesn’t sound like father or husband material. Document as much as possible, has he even asked for visitation? Sounds like he doesn’t want to be with her now or take care of her so why would he want to if you leave? I’d suggest to him that you will take primary care and then he can arrange to see her when it’s convenient for him, see if he even wants to have her? I saw something similar in a friends split dad was the same way and then when they split he didn’t even want to take his baby till she was older like 4 then he started asking for over nights and seeing her more. Which is sad but if he can’t be a good dad and yells at a baby then it’s for the best.

3 Likes

Your baby should come first and shouldn’t have to suffer in any way keep it safe. Love and care always. Don’t let anyone abuse them at all.God be with you.

1 Like

“He’s abusive and neglectful to our baby but I love him”… :roll_eyes: sounds like both of y’all need to grow up.

3 Likes

Hes being abusive and neglecting ur child. Y r u allowing this to continue?

2 Likes