My husband and I argue about how he treats me: Advice?

Need advice: my husband and I fight over how he treats me. Every time it ends with, he’s going to do better, and things will change, and yet it never does. My husband doesn’t buy me gifts for birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, or Valentine’s Day. It breaks my heart and hurts my feelings. I even go out of my way to make sure that his family is taken care of on our holidays and birthdays. Because according to his mother, since I am the woman of the house, it is my job. We are currently going through fertility treatments that we have been doing for 11 months. We are getting ready for a round of IVF, and on Mother’s Day, my husband did nothing for me. We already have a three-year-old. We got into a huge fight, and I told him that it really hurt my feelings and told me I didn’t deserve a Mother’s Day, Then he later apologized and said he didn’t mean it. Today he got mad at me because he wants to buy his father elaborate, expensive laptop for Father’s Day, and I told him I thought that that was a bit much, and I didn’t even get anything for Mother’s Day. I told him I thought with all this extra IVF and fertility stuff in the fact that we have a child I deserve better. He replied, “what is IVF just some pills?”

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So he can put all kinds of thought and money into his dads gift but not for you? I’ll just say this, if you repeatedly tell someone how you feel, if you tell them that what they are doing is hurting you and they do not change, they do not respect you.

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Wow I’m really sorry. I would stop buying gifts for anyone other than your child, and your side of the family if you want. It’s not your responsibility to buy gifts for his family. And if he doesnt get you gifts, then you dont get him gifts.

Uhm… if it were me I think I’d rather be single than deal with a dude like that. And damn sure wouldn’t be trying so hard to have another child with someone who tells me I don’t even deserve Mother’s Day… I sure hope things get better for you! I hate to hear that you deal with that. Prayers girl!

Don’t do a single thing for him on Fathers Day.

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Why bring another baby into this awful relationship.
Stop while you can.

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It will never change!

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Sounds like his mother has taught him that you don’t get anything other than to take care of his kid. My advice: dont give him another one. He sounds like an asshole. Quit wasting your money on his family and buy yourself some stuff since his dumb ass won’t. Seriously though dont have another baby with him.

I can’t comment on your husband because I will be very mean and there’s no need for me to do that. I will say you are an amazingly kind, strong woman and you deserve to be treated like a queen since you treat him like a king. I wish you all the luck in the world!

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I wouldn’t bring more kids into that relationship…

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I would seriously think about how you want to spend the rest of your life. Do you want another child with him, truely? He is most likely never going to change. You have made how you feel clear, he doesnt care. Either leave, or lower your expectations ( I wouldn’t, you are not asking anything crazy). Otherwise you will never be happy.

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And you want another baby with him?

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Why exactly are you trying to have another child with this man? You deserve better, and your three year old deserves a better role model. Would you be happy if your child found a partner that threats them the way your husband treats you?

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I’d seriously reconsider Ivf… Do you really want to bring another child into an environment where the women are expected to give and give and are shown absolutely no appreciation and borderline abusive behavior on his part…

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My husband asked for a weed whacker chainsaw combo for fathers day. I asked him what I got for mothers day…crickets

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Yeah… you shouldn’t be having any more babies with him…

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He sounds very immature and maybe his mother has brought him up in a certain way…That women do everything…So its not in his nature to just think of you as a person really…Its quite an old fashioned view…Im not sure things will change though

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Think hard if you really want to live this life with him. I was in a marriage similar to that and ended up leaving after 17 years. He would forget my birthday and tell me he didn’t need to say happy Mother’s Day to me because I am not his mother, even though we have 2 children together. I am now happier than I’ve ever been. Don’t settle and don’t make excuses for him. Ever.

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Why are you trying to bring another child into that kind of relationship…

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He’s a child. Stop trying to have another child with him.

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