My husband and I no longer have a sex life: How can I fix this?

I’m 24. Currently pregnant, && have two other children. My husband of almost three years is 25. Recently our sex life has been awful!! He can’t get an erection with me… but he’s able to do so by watching porn or by himself… I’ve tried talking to him about it, and I’m just yelled at over it. It’s taken a big toll on how I look at myself… has anyone else gone through this? What helped? If anything… && any ideas what the problem maybe?? I’m so lost!!!

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When this happened to me, he was cheating.

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Watch the Ted Talk about it.

Don’t let someone else’s behavior dictate your self worth :two_hearts: maybe grab a therapist for yourself or the two of you to work through this.

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It sounds like a possible porn addiction. I would seek counseling.

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Could be a number of things. I have the same issue in reverse, I am the one who can’t get to that place anymore. But honestly, it’s because my husband is a jerk of a person, who has hurt me one too many times. Hopefully that’s not the problem for you, but if there’s a chance it could be, I don’t think there’s really anything you can do, but I really wouldn’t know because he hasn’t even bothered to try.

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This sounds like lost of interest. It sucks and its no ones fault it happens.

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In these tough covid times and my not getting my unemployment this far. I’m for hire!
Rent a husband :rofl::rofl::crazy_face:
I accept payment via cashapp only

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Why is it always cheating girls! Dont wanna scare her right away. Guys can cheat and still fuck their wives. If hes still gettin an erection by himself it may be psychological. He may be scared of hurting baby or he just doesnt see u sexually while pregnant. Id see a therapist together may feel like a safe place to explore his feelings

Maybe try something new in the bedroom. A lot of people have a bland sex life and it might only take a bit of excitement or surprise in the bedroom

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Look up Intimacy Anorexia, Sex and Porn Addiction, Betrayal Trauma, and start looking at his behavior and mannerisms and recognizing the correlation of all of it. Then, before you even consider the remote idea that ‘there’s nothing wrong with porn’ I would like you to go research the correlation between porn and sex trafficking, the statistics of women who are drugged and coerced and beaten and pimped out to be raped off-camera once they are tricked into signing that contract. Because once you’re in that business, the only ways out are to do the absolute raunchiest stuff possible to make enough money to buy your way into early retirement, get kicked out (nearly impossible) or commit suicide. Don’t believe me? Feel free to have a look at the research and see how far down that awful rabbit hole goes.

My husband is a recovering porn addict and he himself is still trying to heal his body from developing early-onset ED from the porn, and yes, that is a legit medical side effect.

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Sounds like cheating if hes yelling

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Ask him if he would be willing to try couples counseling maybe even a sex therapist especially if it’s a porn addiction. It’s not always worst case scenario. Wish you the best of luck :sparkles:

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Is it because you are pregnant? A lot of men are afraid or turned off by pregnancy. In some cases there isn’t much you can do and once the baby is born things will go back to normal hopefully. Google it. It’s seriously a thing.

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My husband said sounds like a porn addiction.

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He shouldn’t be yelling at you about it, but maybe he’s embarrassed? Sounds like there’s a lot going on in your family with two children and another on the way. Maybe counseling could help you guys communicate what is happening better, and help find ways outside of yelling to react to those kind of questions? Don’t let it impact how you look at yourself though, it is very unlikely to be related to you.

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try to communicate better with him or tell him how you feel…if he dosnt listen then leave. you shouldn’t have to feel that way.

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My husband didn’t want to have sex when I was pregnant, I was around 6 months maybe. He didn’t like the idea of her head being near his dick. Some guys just aren’t comfortable with sex know their kid is in there 🤷

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Yep, he has become desensitized to the real thing. A very common issue with porn. The fix is not good, because from experience (6 past boyfriends in fact) guys perfer not to deal with the issue( some will leave you as soon as you find out it doesn’t work, whuch he totally lied about), pills often dont work and it can be both physical and psychological. Porn addictiin is real and is bloody degrading…In the end they dont give a crap and you feel horrible about yourself. Sounds like you may well be stuck with him, since you have children. Good luck, long road ahead. You wont win, U should just leave now while you have your sanity.

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Spice things up and make it fun and exciting for both of you :slight_smile:

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