My husband constantly goes through my things and accuses me of cheating: I need advice

My husband and I have been together for 8 years now, and we have kids together. We haven’t had the best relationship; we have split up here and there. The last time we split up, it was because I’ve had enough of his controlling ways. Its always been his way or no way. Well, he is an ex-addict. When we split up, he begged me to take him back, and I wouldn’t do it, so he used to ease the pain he said. That was the first time I have ever left him, all the other times he would leave me for someone else or bc he wanted to party and have fun. We got back together in Dec. Ever since he came back, he hasn’t been the same. He is extremely paranoid; he thinks everyone is trying to set him up and puts him in jail. He thinks I’m in on it too! He will not sleep in the same room as me because he thinks I have cameras set up to watch him. He goes through every receipt I have to try and find something. He will even go as far as to question the kids and ask them what I’ve been doing, or if I’ve had anyone in the house. He goes through my phone, my purse, the car. He even put a recorder in my room to see if I was talking to anyone. He has lost all his friends due to his actions bc he’s even gone as far as to accuse his friends of setting him up and just talking crazy. His friends told me to leave him before he gets worse, and even told me he has been cheating. But he denies ever cheating. He just says I’m the one creating this and that. He just started a couple of months ago, drinking every day all this time. He says really harsh things to hurt me, and most of them are racist things. We are about to have another baby soon, and he cares nothing about this baby as he says it’s not his. We will be sitting in the same room, and he will tell one of the kids to ask me something when I can clearly hear him. He will not go get any kind of help due to the fact that he thinks he is not crazy about being set up or anything. I need advice on how to get him help if his not willing.


No kind of help, is going to help him, until he’s ready to help himself.


He’s probably cheating. Or worse he’s been hurt in the past and he hasn’t gotten over it. Talk to him. I mean really talk to him. And maybe you should see if theres a reason for you to be concerned about his behavior like maybe a guilty conscience.

Honestly, If he can’t accept he has a problem there is nothing you can do. Unless he accepts it you’re stuck. Give him an ultimatum, he gets help or you leave. You will be ok, your children are growing up in an unhealthy environment and will grow up thinking it’s ok


Wow . Sounds just like the life i was living . Every single thing you said . Let me guess ? Meth? My advice is to kick him out or leave .

Dont walk away…run. sounds like hes using again and delusional. I would leave with your children anyway you could.


Is this even really a question? For real you need to leave him. Why the he’ll would you stay???


Run. Run now. Talking from experience the next step is he gets violent. You don’t want that


Um… why would you want to stay with this lunatic? Run. Fast and far.


You know what to do.

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He’s obviously staying in his pain. Doesn’t seem to want to change for the better. He really needs professional help now.

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Go…or make him leave. You can’t save something you don’t have.


Sounds like he is having a mental breakdown, and he needs to get professional help asap.

Sounds like he has a very bad addiction you need to get the kids and go before he kills you and the kids


The one that accuses is most likely the one cheating … Seen it to many times js


Get out while you still can

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Get out now before it’s too late he has mental illness and you can’t fix that only he can you and your kids are in danger

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This is abuse, plain and simple, and not just to you, your kids as well. His drug use and/or mental illness is causing his paranoia and it will only get worse. You should pack up your children and leave before he does something harsher than use his words. Please go before he harms (or worse) you and your children. These relationships never turn out well. You can’t change or help him.


Just do what hes accusing of…might as well

Are you sure he’s not schizophrenic?