Hi, I was wondering if you could keep this anonymous, please. I’m currently three months pregnant with my third child. My husband has one biological child with me and one on the way. He didn’t want any more kids, but we have a miracle. He constantly reminds me he is NOT excited about this baby. He doesn’t ask me how I’m feeling, doesn’t ask if I need anything or when I have an appointment doesn’t ask how it went. I asked him today if he wants to do a little gender reveal for our baby, as we did for my daughter a couple of years ago. His response, “no, that’s stupid. I’m not excited about this at all. We don’t need a gender reveal.” I’m crushed. I feel so alone. I feel like I’m the only one that is excited about this miracle. I feel like I have no one to talk to about my feelings. I feel as if I can’t talk about the baby around him because all he does is ignore me or constantly reminds me he isn’t excited. He picked out a name for the baby, but that’s it. I know three kids can be difficult, but I’m always home with my two kids while he works 60 plus hours a week. I’ve always wanted three kids, a big family, and just to love my babies. I need advice. What do I do? I love him, and I’ve been with him for nine years, but I can’t take how painful this is. It hurts. My heart is crushed. He was so involved with our daughter. Always rubbed my belly, got me my cravings, talked to my belly and loved her before she was even here. This time around it’s the opposite.
I am so sorry love. I am sure he will change his views once baby is here. Sometimes its harder for me to feel a connection when the baby isn’t here. HUGS mama
Fear?..or hes just an asshat who u should leave
Sounds like he might have been planning to leave and now upset he can’t or shouldn’t
I don’t mean the be the Debbie downer but is there a possibility he’s cheating on you? My ex husband and I planned our second baby and he was not excited at all about it, I later found out he was cheating on me and was planning on leaving and now with a new baby, it would be hard to leave, that’s exactly how he acted.
Sit him down and have a serious talk with him. The kids will notice the difference in how he treats them later in life, and if he doesn’t get his act together, he will not bond with this child. He had sex, he took the risk of you ending up pregnant again. Now he needs to step up and be the same kind of dad to this baby that he is to your daughter.
Everyone is so quick to assume he’s cheating but maybe, just maybe, HE DOESNT WANT ANOTHER KID! He works 60 hours, probably hardly sees the kids that he has, and you decided to get pregnant again. You said yourself you always wanted more kids so I doubt this was a “miracle” as you’re calling it. Your husband is stressed and all you care about if yourself. I feel bad for him…
Sounds a bit fishy. I feel like he may be cheating
Everyone saying he’s cheating? Maybe he’s exhausted and can’t handle anymore financial responsibilities… that’s a long time to work and it sounds like it wasn’t a mutal decision to have a baby so he is upset.
I’d leave. Sooner the better but before your baby is born. Document everything.
That’s horrible how he is acting but maybe he’s still in shock. Hopefully once your belly starts growing it will seem more real and he will come around. Just try and stay positive and see how he is once the baby is born.
Maybe you guys no longer want the same things, no longer on the same page. Relationships dont always last. If your not happy and he’s not happy then maybe it’s time to call it over.
He needs a swift kick in the pants just for being a turd. But also, I think you need to reach out to an unbiased 3rd party to have a mediated talk with him and get everything out in the open. Maybe he’s got feelings that he doesn’t know how to express, maybe he’s scared.
It’s fair that you’re excited, but also fair that he isnt. He’s allowed to have feelings & express them, too.
Tell him to man the fuck up or he can leave. He doesn’t get to be shitty about this, it takes two to lay down and create a baby.
You need to remind him that he was half of the equation!
Me and my husband each have one daughter from previous relationships ( so 2) and when we TRIED to have a baby I got pregnant like in a week. After I found out I was pregnant he started regretting it bc our girls are older (15 and 6 then) and he didn’t wanna start all over but we were hoping for a boy. When we found out I was having another girl his whole attitude changed. Def regretted knocking me up and just didn’t want 3 girls in general. I cried. Alot. Granted he went to all my appointments but that’s it. But when I was Induced and she was born, let me tell you, that baby had him wrapped all the way around her finger and she’s the biggest daddys girl. Maybe he’s just stressed. I wish I would have sat him down and talked to him about it. Maybe try that approach. Maybe he is just stressed to the max and doesn’t realize how bad words and actions can hurt especially with pregnancy hormones
I’m so sorry you are going thy this during what is supposed to be a happy time. Have you spoken to him about why he is not happy about it?
Am I reading this wrong? " My husband has one biological child and one on the way" is she meaning the one she is carrying or???
Ill take the baby!!!