My husbands dad moved in with us and we gave him our room, then we found out he is sending money to some girl: What should we do?

About four months ago, my father-in-law came to live with us because he lost his house he said due to his wife passing away he couldn’t afford it. Come to find out about a few months later; we found out that he has been sending money to some girl he’s never met in a different state. My husband and I have four children together, two boys two girls we live in a 3-bedroom house the kids have their own room my father-in-law is now in my room, and I and my husband have been sleeping on the couch. As of last night I found out that he just sent this woman $3,000 I feel like I’m being used and that me and my children are displaced my husband is getting upset because he also feels used but at the same time does not want his father to be homeless what would you guys do suggestions how to address this?

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Put him on the couch. He’s not homeless but not comfortable either.

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Find out who the girl us and contact her. Let her know it stops now or charges will be pressed. She is taking advantage of a elderly man.

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Tell him you know. Ask if he needs counseling make a plan to stop the flow of money

Take the bedroom back ASAP and set timeframe to move out

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This isn’t about you right now this is about the mental health of the FIL. He might have early onset dementia. Your focus should be getting control of his finances.

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If he can afford to send someone $3000 then he can afford to live on his own. I would definitely talk to him about it first. Tell him to quit being naive etc bc it’s not right to send money to people he doesn’t know. I wouldn’t have given up my room. Let him stay in the living room.

You and your husband discuss confronting him about it. Sit down with him and have a discussion preferably without the kids in the house. Tell him the truth about how you feel about it.

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What does your husband want to do. It’s his father.

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If he can afford to send her $3000 he can afford to move out. There is no easy way to approach this, just rip the band aid off!

Have a conversation with your father in law. Tell him how you feel. Ask him what’s happening. And ask him to start contributing to the household
If he doesn’t want to help he needs to move out.

Wow. Definitely should not be sleeping in your room. Give him the couch. You and your husband need to talk to him about his actions. It’s not right.

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I would check his mental status then put him on a roll away bed in the livingroom.

If he has 3000 to send to a girl, he can have his own place.

Put his butt on the couch

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… could be one his kids that he didn’t tell anyone about. Could’ve cheated on his wife at one point and had to forget about her for the sake of their marriage ?

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Is his father competent? Does he have dementia?
If not I would seek counseling then invite him to a session. Good to have a third party mediator. :broken_heart:

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Definitely let him know this is not ok. Put him on the couch and let him know he needs to get his own place asap.

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Inforn the police… shes probably a fraudster

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He got money send to someone he never met. Which he’s being scammed He can afford his own place. Put him onthe couch till you find him a place then he stop wasting money. Put your foot down. You being used !!!