My husbands family doesn't like me: What should I do?

Hi, my family in law doesn’t like me and they think that I’m not a good mother or wife, they talk on my back, specifically my mother in law and my brothers-in-law girlfriend, and I don’t know how to react by their comments and faces, I had a problem breastfeeding and they judge me about it, my mother in law made me a lot of comments about how I parenting my baby girl, she’s 3 months old and make a lot of faces, she’s so cute, and when she makes an angry face they said that’s because of me, that she learned from me, they watching everything thing I do My husband told me that my actions hurt them because I choose to ignore them, but he doesn’t realize that his family makes me feel like a stranger and like if I am the nanny and not the mom.

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That is your baby at you raise her the way that you choose to and don’t worry about what they have to say. It’s not their child!

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You can’t control what other people say or do but you are in control of how you react to them and how you handle them. If they are making you feel that way and say those things then stop going around them and stop bringing your daughter around them period. That is toxic and neither of you should put up with it and if your husband really has the nerve to tell you that you are hurting them for ignoring the comments then he needs a kick in the pants and a wake up call. Stand your ground and show them you wont tolerate there behavior towards you and your baby anymore

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Ummm, yeah, STAY AWAY from them. And your husband should have YOUR back. That is your child, not theirs. And honestly, tell them to f**k off if you feel like it also. This is a very vulnerable time for you. Post partum can also be playing a role in your emotions. Don’t be afraid to stick up for yourself. You should have a BIG talk with your husband. If he don’t understand or get it, then you need to do what’s best for you and your child.

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First off, correct your husband because his stank ass attitude towards you is uncalled for. Then let it be known, you don’t need anybody’s BS of approval of what is a “good” mom. Baby fed, bathed, clothed, nurtured, then I see no problems. Babies will do what babies do, they develop their own personalities. New mom, don’t let them effect you negatively because your baby needs a happy but tired mommy.

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He should be standing up for you and not allowing them to disrespect you. Have a talk with him about that.

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I’d laugh when they say that and say something like ‘I don’t know, she’s looking/acting more like Grandma every day!’ :wink:

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It took 16 yrs before my mother in started to like me I just ignored everything she said and killed her with kindness and she finally came to be my biggest supporter and told my husband I was the best thing that had ever happened to him

Your husband should be sticking up.for you also you need to.tell your in laws they are not going to be disrespectful to you anymore if it continues dont allow them in your house or go to.theirs and tell.your husband to back you up dont let it continue otherwise it will cause problems all the time it goes on my ex and his parents were bloody horrible and they still try to control me and the kids even now we are divorced

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To be honest. F*** them and sorry but your husband also. :woman_shrugging: If that man truly loved and valued you he would shut his family down immediately!!! Either you’ll stay with a man who allows his family to talk crap about you and then blame you for why they do or move on and be happy. No need to be around those people and no need for your child to be. Families like this are evil and will suck the soul out of you. Should of never married him knowing his family hates you.

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Use it to you advantage don’t visit them. If they want to see the child let your husband go with the child. Day off for you. Win win situation :grin:

What’s wrong with these people

F what they think. You’re not with them!!!

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Stand your ground and tell then how they make you feel. If you dont feel comfortable to visit then, then you tell your husband no. You can get a bad case post partum depression cause of those bitches. It’s not your fault she makes that face. It’s probably theirs because they feel that emotion strongly from them. Your mental state and how you feel your taking care of your baby is all tha matters. If you husband cant understand that then you need to tell them what they are doing and hoe they make you feel and you are not obligated to go and visit. Nor are they allowed to see you or your child if they want to act that way.

Your husband should be talking to his mom and telling them to stop

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Sounds line your family in law is highly toxic. I would expect my hubs to speak to his family regarding the way they treat you. You deserve respect, abs if they cane give it to you then they wont give it to your daughter.

It’s not only difficult for you but also puts your husband in a bad situation with his family. I think you should sit down and speak with your husband and ask him to speak to family or have a rational family meeting and put it all out on the table.
It’s not a good situation for your child to grow up see the tension and disrespectful things family does. Your all adults and come to conclusions or part your ways. Cut & dry no beating around bush. Settle it before your daughter gets older & harder for her to grown up in this situation.
Good luck!

My husbands family doesn’t like me and have been extremely rude and tried to split us up. My husband doesn’t associate with them because of it. He told his mother to consider him dead to her because she posted a status about me 🤷

Surround yourself with other moms. They will always have your back and give you good advice. People try to make you miserable because they are not happy with themselves. Pity them because they are so miserable.

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First and foremost talk to husband about it and tell him how they’re making you feel. Next confront them about their shitty comments. Third educate them about the fact that baby’s that age aren’t even mimicking facial expressions yet and that they just make faces because muscles and such and developing. I’d go so far as to tell them that’s what the pediatrician told you. And fourth, if they still continue to be assholes tell them they aren’t welcome to see you or baby until their attitude changes. Hubby doesn’t have to like it.

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