My husbands mom doesn't care much about our kids: Advice?

Can you post this anonymously, thank you. My son is 15 months old, and we recently found out I am pregnant. This will be my mom’s fourth grandchild and my husband’s mom’s seventh grandchild. My mother has been in my sons life and sees him pretty much every day and helps with whatever we need, my husbands mom doesn’t really care about our firstborn, when we went to visit her my son was three months old at the time when she met him, and she completely rejected him and didn’t want to hold or do anything with him, but ask for money(no we didn’t give it to her) after that we left. We stop talking to her then when he turn 11 months we saw her again and she still acted the same towards him, but he loves and plays with her other grandchildren, so my question is what should we do? My husband doesn’t care if we keep seeing her or not, I just don’t want my kids growing up feeling like she doesn’t care for them.

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He has your mom as grandma. Don’t keep going around her because soon your child will see/feel that energy.

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If he doesn’t care to see her then you shouldn’t either :thinking::muscle: you need people that will love your kids . Not people that won’t . Fam or not fam … you got your mom that’s all that matters . :blush::heart:

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That’s her loss. If your husband is fine not seeing her than let it be. Yours kids will be ok without her. :+1: All that matters is you as parents love your children. Sometimes it’s better not dealing with family that are like that.

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Stop bringing your child around her. If your husband doesn’t care. Let her go. No need for him to be rejected over and over.

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If she can’t act like a grandma then she doesn’t need to be one. The kids will eventually feel her energy and see she favors one over the other. Your kids don’t need that nonsense, cut ties now.

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I’d let her be. I would never beg anyone, to be in my Children’s lives!

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Dont force your child on ANYONE. Thats mistake #1. If she comes around once a year cool let her… the kids will eventually see who was there and who wasnt.

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I mean if your husband doesn’t care if he sees his mom again why is this even a question?

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I could understand if your husband cared, but It seems like he done. Just make sure that they see there cousins and other family members. Some kids don’t have it at all

My boyfriend’s mother lives 5 minutes away, if that. Doesn’t ask us about our son, doesn’t come see our son. The only time she sees our child is if we are riding with her somewhere or if shes dragging in stuff we dont need. She’ll say she’ll babysit and never comes through, usually some off the wall excuse. Last time she said its because she thinks she has MS. She doesn’t.

Let your husbands mom do whatever. Your kids have your mom as grandma. I wouldnt even sweat it. Its her loss.

It doesn’t seem like she does care, which is probably what your child will think. It seems to be what your husband thinks already. I would just leave it alone.

Nothing you can do to change her. Your husband obviously isn’t close with his mother. He doesn’t care that she’s not involved. You shouldn’t either. Your child won’t feel rejected by someone they don’t even really know.

So invite the other grand kids to visit you guys she dosent have to be part of it and everyone is happy

People love in different ways it’s true my parents are super hands on with my kids but are kinda hi and bye with my oldest sister kids it’s not that they don’t love them the same it’s just my kids are always around them and they are more comfortable with them. Then my husbands parents are far away and they love are kids but obviously the distance keeps them from showing that love. I think you should talk to her and bring the kids more around her maybe she doesn’t feel comfortable

I’d stay away. You don’t want your son to feel that kind of negativity. What a crappy grandma

As a grandma I don’t understand that, I love all my grandchildren the same. But I’ve been treated that way as a child by a family members, you feel the energy. I would avoid the baby will eventually get older and pick up on it. No kid deserves to not feel good enough to a grandma. She obviously has issues.

If she doesnt care I wouldnt bring him.around her. However has your husband ever asked her why?

Don’t force anyone to be in your child’s life. He will be ok. Just always remind him how much he is loved. Toxic is toxic and it sounds like she needs to be cut off

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Eh, they are better off without her.