My MIL has said she would take my daughter without my permission: Thoughts?

I need some advice on how to kindly tell my fiancé’s mom to back off while still being respectful Last night my fiancé’s aunt stayed the night with my fiancé’s mom and us, me and his aunt were talking about our trip to Arkansas next month to surprise my fiancé’s cousin, well his aunt started joking around and was like well you aren’t coming with us. I said, well if I don’t go, my kid doesn’t go. Well, his aunt was like, oh, I mean obviously. My daughter doesn’t even let me take my granddaughter, and she’s three years old. Well, his mom was like no it’s okay we will just drug you and take Hazel grace with us. By the time you wake up, we will be in Arkansas already. I said yea and I WILL call the cops on you and press charges. She goes oh, I will just tell them that her dad gave me permission. I said Blake (my fiancé) would NEVER give you permission AFTER I said no. And she just laughed and goes yea that’s what you think; he’s my son. This completely pissed me off bc I took it as her basically saying that she would take my daughter whenever she wanted, and I couldn’t do shit about it bc HER son would just give her permission. First off, not no, but hell no, would he go against me on something like that. Well, today, we went to a little flea market type thing and a Festival of Lights they were having in town. We went to breakfast, and I had to make my girls bottle while trying to fight with her for her to calm down. Neither one of them asked me for help (mom &aunt). Then when we went to leave, they walked out without even waiting for me to put my girl in her car seat or anything. I had to carry her car seat AND her diaper bag bc his mom decided that I didn’t need help. Well, after that, his aunt got her granddaughter, so I understand that she has to take care of her, but his mom completely ignored Hazel Grace and me to be with his aunt and her granddaughter. She held her pretty much all damn day long but hardly said two words to Her own granddaughter, and I know this is going to seem stupid, but it really upset me!

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Ew, I’d be distancing myself from that mess. I’d slap ANYONE who threatened to kidnap my child. Jokingly or not.

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Personally I think you mil was teasing about taking your daughter and was said in jest. My family sometimes says things that are out there just to tease. Don’t be too sensitive

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Dont engage in power struggles. You are mom and what you say goes. Sounds petty and childish to suggest drugging someone and taking their kid. Rise above and walk away.

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A situation that escalated rapidly, then carried over to another day.
Learning to respond instead of reacting would’ve been helpful.
Life’s too short.

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Girl. Learn to take a joke. If you wouldn’t have kept going on and on she wouldn’t have either.

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If you need help, open your mouth and ask for it.
As far as the drugging situation…your husband needs to address it with his mother, but as a family

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That doesn’t sound stupid. I’d be spending much less time with her in the future and I’d have your fiance talk to his mom and tell her what’s up because what she said was horrible and wrong.

If it’s not dad or you no one else is allowed to take your child without your permission damn !! And they way they acted ? I would of kicked them to the curve along time ago !!!

Move out. Go to a shelter if you must. They don’t respect you or your boundaries. Why don’t you have your own place? Your bf should have stood up for you.

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It’s your kid why would she have to help carry her out… lol but i wouldn’t be around someone threatening to drug me MIL or not. Y’all sound crazy.

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It was a joke! Like she’s really gonna drug you and steal your child!!?? Lighten up!

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Stop hanging out with them. Make sure you and your fiance are on the same page. And you are a tough mom, you can carry a diaper bag and a carseat, we all do it. Wait until you have 3!

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Sounds like you all started out playing and you got upset by it. Now grandma has backed off ( which is something I would have done) and now you’re complaining about that. Chill out.

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You are fighting imaginary battles. If you know your man would stand up to her… let it go… unless you really have reason to believe that she would commit a few felonies just to take your daughter on a trip- you are being ridiculous. And if you do believe that- why the hell are you living with her?

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Ok… so I get them joking … but I think they took the ish way too far by how they presented it. I’d be pissed tf off too. In my opinion you should talk to your fiance about your feelings towards it , and take a break from them for a bit …

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It may or may not have been a joke, none the less she shouldn’t have said it. It shows she has no respect for her as the mother of her grandchild. Your fiance needs to have a talk with his mother. I have never had to ask for help when my kids were babies, everyone always grabbed their carseat and them while I carried the diaper bag. I’m small so carrying even a newborn in a carseat is hard for me. You shouldn’t have to ask for help but if no one helps and you need it, don’t hesitate to ask.

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Yeah no. Just her going so far to explain HOW she would take my kid? Lmfao it’ll be a while before shes allowed to see my kid without a sincere apology. And only supervised. Shes mental that one.

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Id tell her that even though shes his mum and that she will always have a special place in his heart, the family he made with you will always be priority.

She was joking I am sure and you took it way too personal. To me you acted like you are the only person that matters in that little girls life and that daddy didn’t even have a say in his own child. You acted like a snob IMO and then expected them to help you and cater to you by waiting for you… after you treated them like shit basically :slight_smile: think about that for a moment. A mother who disregards daddy and his family and won’t even let them take the child without mommy hovering over expects help holding a diaper bag and expects them to love on and hold the child all day.