My mom causes drama and accuses my wife of cheating: What can I do?

My wife and I have a baby girl together, and we do as much as we can for her, I’m doing what’s best for my girls. But she and I have been dealing with an issue when it comes to being around my family when my mom is around. She and I love being around my aunts/uncles, the number of cousins I got, but most importantly, we love being around my grandma since my grandma took her under her wing. But the problem is my girl was six months pregnant with our daughter at the time; my mom started up this drama about apparently my daughter not being mine. Now I know her a fact my baby is mine because she came out all looking like daddy just with mommies attitude. My mom ran her mouth to my family about it, and it destroyed us because we thought my family would think differently of her, but thankfully, they didn’t. My question is, what can my family and I do say or do to cut my moms act out because she won’t come near our kid or family when we’re around, it’s to the point it’s hurting my grandma a lot. Is there anyone that can give us a helping hand because it’s just a web my mother made, and it’s hurt us all. My grandma went as far as to throw in my mom’s face that if she doesn’t believe, then she pays for a DNA test. I’m honestly confused and hurt. Please help

33 Likes

No, do not dare put your wife and child through that to appease your mother. She’s bullying your wife and treating your child like crap for no reason. It’s your mother’s fault your grandmother is hurting. I’d say it’s good she’s not in the picture. Can you imagine how this makes your wife feel? I’d be heartbroken. Your mother can carry on her tantrum.

8 Likes

If someone’s SO adamant about making these accusations and making your life miserable, you need to tell them to hit the highway. Sometimes family is the most cruel to us and it’s not needed. You and your children and your wife don’t need this kind of person around, family or not. So. I’d just tell these people you aren’t bringing them around anymore and they are no longer welcome. That’s a lot of drama and hurt and anger that’s being caused.

4 Likes

Post this question on your Facebook for your mom to see the pain she is causing

6 Likes

Get a DNA test prove the B*tch wrong and worry about you and yours.

3 Likes

If your mom wants to be apart of the family shell cut the shit! You should really sit her down and give her this ultimatum

Sometimes our family is more toxic than anyone else. And it’s ok to cut toxic out of your life.

15 Likes

I believe you need to sit down with your mom and lay down the facts and how you wish to proceed from here. If she can’t accept it then you need to move on. Your kids, your wife and your needs come first. You’ve proven to be stronger then her accusations already just by acknowledging that she is in the wrong and didn’t question anything about your kiddo. Don’t let an older woman stubbornness get the best of you.

7 Likes

I’d purposely do a DNA test to make her shut up, but wont ever speak to her again.

7 Likes

A toxic person is a toxic person wether they are family or not. Toxic people shouldn’t have a place in your life.

4 Likes

I tell you right now that wouldn’t fly in my household. My mother would just have to be shut down. She seems very toxic and controlling bc she doesn’t like the wife.

3 Likes

Try not including your mom in family functions. Let everyone one know in a nice way why. Maybe if she hears how to behave from other’s she will stop acting out. Sometimes you have to treat parent’s as children so they can learn. The family you make is more important than who you came from

Sounds like your mom realized she was wrong and she has too much pride to apologize. I’d have some members of the family talk to her, if she doesn’t budge, keep your distance. Your little family and grandma do not need that toxic crap around.

2 Likes

Not sure what’s up but from experience. I married a black man. We have been married for 16 years. My family is a racist family and I haven’t talked to my mom in 13 years. Toxic people can be your family. I know it hurts but if she makes your life, relationship a living hell it’s ok not to have her in your life. If you know it’s your baby who cares what people think. But if you have any doubt at all I suggest a DNA if you are legally married you have 30 days to do that or you will be daddy til the child is 21 and if wife leaves you guess what you owe child support. Good luck.

3 Likes

I believe your mother is jealous of your spouse… not sure u can do anything unless your mom is wanting to help change the situation also😞. Good luck to you both I have a mother in law that behaves like this and has spread nasty things about me as well. I wish things were different and good but she hasn’t really ever truly cared for them to be, even tried to set my married husband up with women she "preferred " …

3 Likes

Honestly, I would (personally) sit down with mom and have a nice thorough conversation on “Everyone’s entitled to their own opinion but keep your opinion to yourself because you’re causing pain to my family with these accusations. I want my kids and my wife to be loved by you as much as I love them. If you’re going to keep this up, I don’t want my family around you”. Type thing. That’s what I did to a similar subject and my family member backed off and that’s in the past now and we’re all fine. Defiantly don’t put your wife in the position where she is alone with your mom. Your wife and kids are all that matters at the end of the day. But that’s just my opinion! I hope things get better for y’all :blue_heart:

5 Likes

Some people are worth avoiding.

2 Likes

Take a DNA test, show her the physical proof that your daughter is yours. Then let her know she lost the privilege of ever being in her granddaughter’s life.

8 Likes

You walk away from mom and tell her to grow up and when she can talk to you like an adult come speak and if you are invited to family things go take your wife and child and good for you standing up your mom will have to deal with her own demons maybe put it back on her and say are you feeling guilty about something is my dad my dad or is it someone else see what she does and says

3 Likes

No no no! Don’t humiliate your wife and child because your Mother can’t get her act right. Her actions have NOTHING to do with your beautiful little family. That is her made up problem. She is treating your daughter, wife and grandma like this is what’s hurting me most. Imagine how your wife feels, or your babygirl for that matter. Your mother needs to stay busy, gain a hobby. Leave her be, don’t come around her or put your family in a position to where they are to be treated in such a fucked up way. You protect and love them. Just stay from her, she might be going through something. Let’s just “say” you got a DNA test…she would STILL not be satisfied I am sure.