My mom is constantly criticizing my husband: Advice?

Definitely move but now that she’s gotten comfortable speaking to you like that it likely won’t change after you move. Boundaries need to be set or expect that every time she’s around your family

1 Like

Definitely get your own place! Not only will it reduce the stress of living with someone, it will give y’all a sense of pride and accomplishment, not to mention your own lives, space and freedom. Go for it because it will only get worse if you don’t.

You need to move out, and both work

1 Like

Was in the same boat , move out and visit them minimumly or not at all as they will do it without thinking as though it’s normal and it will get to you to the point where I don’t speak to my parents it’s said but they don’t know when to stop

2 Likes

It’s time to get your own place…I don’t know you or your financial situation as to why you and your family are living with your parents…but you definitely need to get out asap if you want to have a good relationship going forward with your mom plus a situation like that will put a strain on your marriage and it’s definitely not good for your children also

She is trying to make your husband be a man and support his family. Let’s face the facts, If it weren’t for her, you all would be homeless.

2 Likes

No advice, but I’m going through a similar thing. My fiancé, daughter, and I live with my fiancé’s dad and stepmom. His dad is great but tensions with his stepmom are building by the day. I stay home with our daughter, and since I don’t work I do house chores. But it’s to where I do literally EVERY household chore except their laundry and mowing grass/shoveling snow. I even pick up their two large dog’s poop. And I get scolded if chores aren’t done by a certain time of day. Keep in mind I take care of 7 month old, and I have to make dinner for everyone. We were threatened to be kicked out because I did the dishes in the afternoon instead of in the morning. The two dogs bark all day. (She online shops and Amazon or ups is here at least 3 times a day) they wake my daughter from naps and she won’t do anything about it. When my daughter is cranky (because of no naps) or if she’s really happy and vocal (just mumbles and squeaks) his stepmom says she “can’t handle it and I need to take her out of the room” which means I eat a lot of meals cold or just give up on eating that meal. We aren’t allowed to eat outside of the kitchen because of ants. His stepmom eats anywhere she wants which attracts ants and we get blamed. She constantly says she’s ashamed of my fiancé for not working enough (he works at least 10 hours a day 4-5 days a week). She barges into our room whenever she wants. She knows I breastfeed and I’m a private person about that, but she just comes in anyway. And when she does, she allows the dogs in our room, and they chew on my daughters toys. Sorry I ranted. We’re hopefully moving in the beginning of April if my fiancé gets the job he’s interviewing for. :crossed_fingers:oh and she gives my daughter chocolate and candy without my permission. She’s got the “grandma can do anything” attitude

2 Likes

Never let ANYONE belittle your HUSBAND! Get away and have a happy life and marriage, life is too short to live that way.

Time to get your own place

Exactly. What I told my family my now Dead Mom is not living with us until the kids are gone, Heard enough when her mom live with us when I was a kid .

Get your own place. It could be she is also stressed with so many people there. Either way, having your own place you won’t have this happening

2 Likes

Get your own place??? Hes a grown man and clearly doesn’t provide properly lol. This is humerous

5 Likes

Of course you need to get your own place. A mother expects her partners partner to provide well for her and her family. That’s what adults do. I know things have been crazy lately but living in your parents home as adults with kids its going to cause conflict.
You can set strickter boundaries when you have your own home.

1 Like

My husband and I stayed with my dad while moving between towns and having a new baby.
It was like this for 8 months and then we finally moved.
Now when it happens I can tell my dad that not everyone is perfect like him.

Move out. She feels like she gets a say because you live under her roof.

5 Likes

Get your own place. Never and I mean never let anyone disrespect your spouse. She has something to say then step up and defend him because you know if it were his family that talked down to you that you’d want him to defend you. Once it’s done so much then your spouse can feel a type of way towards you and that damage be undone and it’s something you allowed to happen. You’re allowing her to disrespect him, how would you feel if he stood back and let his mother talk down to you? Disrespect you? Treat you like you don’t do anything right? So step up. Move out and defend your husband.

2 Likes

You most definitely should move out. But everyone is always going to have an opinion about your life, but the only opinion that matters in yours. Ignore the negativity and politely say that it’s your life you will do with it what you please.

Move out… it will make your life much easier.

My advice move out her home her rules when you move out you can chose when you see her and where eg your home where you dictate the rules

1 Like

Is there a reason you don’t have your own place? Really can’t complain when your living under someone else’s roof.

6 Likes