My mom thinks I am too strict as a parent: Thoughts?

We are strict parents. Everyone parents differently, we’re just the strict ones! We don’t allow our kids just to do whatever or say whatever. We run a structured household, so our kids know how to be well mannered and appropriate. Our friends comment on how well behaved our kids are all the time. When they spend the night with their friends, the parents always say how nice they are, and they say please and thank you, etc. We don’t allow our kids to pull toys out all over our house. Of course, we encourage creativity and allow them to make “messes,” but they have to do so in their rooms. We don’t have a playroom in our house, so they’re toys are in their rooms. My parents think that my boyfriend and I are horrible parents because we don’t allow our boys to drag things out all over the place. My mom actually made a comment to me yesterday that, “I shouldn’t even be a parent since I want to be so strict.” Are we really that awful of parents because we don’t run a chaotic household? I just believe that everyone parents differently, there’s the “free-spirited” parents and there’s us. Thoughts?

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Kids are only kids once. Then they’ll be grumpy adults worried about messes kids make.

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I have 9 kids…toys are apart of having kids 🤷🤷 they have a playroom but the 2 babies have their own age appropriate toys and they r in our living room 🤷 mess gets cleaned up b4 the kids go to bed. People know of they r coming to my house its kid oriented and toys will be out.

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There is such thing as too strict. Let your kids be kids.

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Have a well structured household. Sure why not. But let your boys be boys!

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You raise your kids how you see fit. As far as mess of toys. I agree. They should stay in their rooms and they should take out what they are using. If not they will be everywhere. You can also show them to pick up after playing with whatever. I don’t call that strict you are just orderly. And that is ok.

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Order and responsibility are extremely important things to teach your children of course, but if it isn’t balanced with equal parts of patience and grace and love and nurturing then the kids can often feel like everything they do is wrong.

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Not that you’re gonna ever listen to the advice of strangers. But don’t take away their childhood

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I wouldn’t say it too strict. Messes can be cleaned out of the livingroom too but they are your kids. If u want their stuff to be played with in their room it’s not a big deal. It’s not serious enough for anyone to say u shouldn’t be a parent. That is ridiculous.

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I applaud you for having a well-structured house and to be honest with you I wish I had the willpower or whatever you want to call it to do that because it would definitely be easier sometimes I think but it doesn’t work in our house at least right now they do have very nice manners though and they are very caring

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Honestly your mom is a grandma lol my mom was so strict when I was growing up but is the most relaxed fun grandma ever roles have changed but definitely parent the way you see fit

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Structure and rules are super important.

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Tell her you are raising children and not wild banshees.

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Tell her to shove it. Making them okay with toys in their rooms isnt “taking away their childhood” :roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes: kids need order and rules in a home. That doesnt make you a bad parent.

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We have bins for everything. They can each pick one at a time. And it all has to be cleaned before getting anything else. They are 6 and 4 and now know that so it’s not even an issue. I don’t want my house looking trashed

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I think you sound fine! In our first house, where our son was an infant, there simply wasn’t room for him to leave toys everywhere. He either played with them in his room, or helped us put them away at night.
Now we’re in a bigger house, and he has a play room. We give him more latitude to make a mess in there, but he still is responsible for keeping the room "walkable ". One of his Saturday chores is to pick up his playroom and make it presentable.

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Honestly that is not nearly enough information about your house and what goes on in it to answer a question like this

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Raise them how you want they’re your kid. But just because some parents let their kids drag out toys, doesn’t mean it’s a chaotic household. Trust me, kids can bring out their toys to the living room without being chaotic.

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Let the kids play smh bet you would wish you had let them if God forbid something happened to them… Messes can be cleaned

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Shoot how we parent our daughter gets so many comments…and to which we reply…worry bout yo’self​:v::v: