My five-year-old son has always been a very well behaved child. I get compliments every time I go somewhere with him. (Well before this current pandemic.) Anyhow all of a sudden, he is loud, rowdy, won’t listen, and is hurting himself when he gets angry. Like if I tell him no and he doesn’t like what I said, he will hit himself in the head. It really just breaks my heart. This change happened over the past two weeks. Nothing drastic has changed in our lives other than he will be starting a “digital academy” in a couple of weeks. I feel like a horrible mother! Should I take him to see a therapist? Is this my fault? I’m so very scared of him. I lost his big sister right after she was born, and if anything ever happened to my other kids, I don’t know what I would do. This is keeping me up most nights and has me praying for guidance/answers. I’d appreciate any insight you have. Thank you
Yes! Take him to a therapist! He has a lot of emotions and needs to learn to cope
Alot of kids are dealing with this. You are doing fine as a mother. Between all the changes going since March plus not seeing friends. A therapist could help him deal with the emotions. Until just continue the patience and love you have been giving.
You are not alone mama! My oldest who is turning 8 next month has been the exact same way! My son will hit himself when he’s angry and we continue to talk to him about it when it happens. It doesn’t happen as often but if he gets very upset then he does. I havent thought to take my son to therapy to be honest i don’t feel that it’s warranted for my son but if you feel in your heart something is wrong then you for to follow your mom instincts. Just know your not alone and kids are learning how to deal with different emotions and sometimes they just dont know how to deal with them. There is alot going on in the world and the kids may not know what’s going on they can sense the things aren’t right either. Stay strong mama your not alone!
I have a 7 year old doing. Its taking toll on both of us. As a single mom with depression and PTSD its a struggle. Your not alone. I take 1 day at time. It will get better.
krav maga has been a life saver fir us. Its a form of karate. My oldest is almost 6 and had serious issues controlling his anger an emotions in general. In krav, he learns to control them and gives him an outlet for the aggression. We take him to premier martial arts on 1488. Its a small family environment. We love it! Bonus points that he is learning to defend himself!
Please seek counselling and don’t be hard on yourself this whole th2ibg is hard on all of us. Especially kiddos who don’t understand why there little world has been turned upside down.
My Niece acts like this she has a form of Autism called Pda…Which means she has high levels of anxiety and when things are different i.e The pandemic she got a lot worse…She masks her emotions everywhere until she is with me or her mum…Her school opened 3wks before summer and she wouldnt go…Her anxiety had got so bad…One day we managed to get her the school and she went hysterical crying clinging to her mum and wouldnt go in…She has never shown this at school…So we knew her anxiety was bad…Have you noticed any anxiety in your child…We have now learnt that her anger and aggression is basically a panic attack…It appears to others as being naughty but knowing her behaviour we know how changes can increase the anxiety…Which leads to the crying and fearfulness or aggression…It maybe just the changes as its big even for adults…Hope things settle down
A lot of kids are dealing with similar issues… they dont know whats going on and are scared and worried. Things are unknown and they have no control.
Counseling could help. My son is 8 he has had a fear of this pandemic it seems to help him
Hi mom he probably needs to vent. It has been hard for us adults to cope with our feelings, and harder yet for the kids
Kids will be erratic when something doesn’t feel right for them. The best way to help them feel better is to let them cry those feelings out. I have been an attachment parenting instructor for some time now and, when emotions take over, crying always helps.
This doesn’t mean you will MAKE your baby cry but give him a chance to do so without trying to stop it. Stay close, offer him comfort and talk as little as you can. Being able to cry feelings out will help him feel so much better!
Try talking to him about ways he can express his frustrations. Give him words and help him find words for what he is feeling. He is 5, my almost 9 year old went through behavior changes at 5 when he would get frustrated I’d put him in a safe place and tell him we both needed a timeout and we could talk about it when he calmed down. At first he kicked and screamed but after a few days he realized it helped. I always got compliments on his behavior and how sweet/well behaved he was. I think it’s a normal change on top of quarantine. If he is hitting himself tell him that’s not the answer to his problem but don’t give it too much attention when he stops talk to him. He isn’t going to knock himself out. But giving the behavior attention unfortunately encourages it, they know you feel bad and are more likely to give in.
This is very normal behavior for a child who is frustrated. My five year old has been acting out like that for several months now. My nine year old is struggling with behavior issues too. They’re both depressed and say they want to hurt themselves. Unfortunately due to this pandemic this is the new normal. But I talk with them a lot, offer support and understanding, and have had several deep conversations with them about self harm and the tragedy of suicide. This won’t last thankfully. Stay strong for him as best you can.
Mamma, lockdown is hard!!! I found that my 2 boys became really frustrated because they don’t know how to deal with the magnitude of what is happening. I would definitely recommend a visit or 2 to a play therapist or a child psychologist for both your and his mental well being. This is a rough year so please be kind to yourself. You are doing an amazing job!!!
All children feel this great change were having and all we can do is try to make him understand it will get better and love him more eachday,and most importantly let God guide you just pray,talk to him ,he listensand I’ll pray for you both,
I think about 99% of all of us moms know exactly what you’re going through. My four year old daughter has turned into a sixteen-year-old monster no joke she talks back she throws things timeout doesn’t work no more a spanking doesn’t work and I think of the day I feel like I’m doing something wrong. But I’m going to say the same thing that my mama told me it’s not you you’re being a wonderful mother, it’s just the way things are right now and kids don’t know how to handle it.
I can’t offer much help, I’m literally going through the same thing, my 6 year old has turned into a brat, my 12 year old just fights all the time and my 16 year old hardly comes out of her room… And when she does it’s quite dramatic. We also lost my husband’s father to cancer last week so that doesn’t make it any easier. Everyone is suffering through this, seems like crazy is the new normal. Wonderful to see all moms tell their own stories and give advice. When things get very bad I just hug them. They are battling to cope, we all are, so it’s just one day at a time
My 4 year old used to hit himself, as hard as it is to do ignore it! Unless he is in physical danger don’t acknowledge the behavior. Always praise good behavior, a lot of issues stem from boredom and little ones don’t always know how to vent feelings properly
Don’t hesitate to contact a therapist. You could both learn ways to cope better with the pandemic or find out if there may be other issues your child might be dealing with.
My daughters almost 4 and she’s always been well behaved but being home during this whole thing she’s acting the same way. I’m going crazy but trying to keep my calm and just talk to her