My boyfriend and his two kids moved in with my three kids about four months ago and me. He works Monday through Thursday, and I work part-time and stay home with kids. His kids go to their grandparents every weekend while mine have nowhere to go. They come home bragging about name brand shoes and clothes they are bought while there. Also, I was told they would all be treated the same at birthdays and Christmas and was far from true. Now my kids and I are and were just fine with not having a whole lot because we have each other. But now they’re resenting the other children for this and so am I.
They’re their grandparents. Not your kids .
Those kids are just excited about receiving those things…resentment towards children out of jealousy is an issue!
They are allowed to brag about what they recieved.
You seem to have the issue.
Maybe ask their dad to tell them that bragging isn’t nice. How are they going to know, otherwise. You really can’t do anything about the gift giving, and it’s definitely not your place to put a stop to it.
I deal with something similar but the kids are not at fault. And as an adult you shouldnt feel resentment. I use it as a way to push me to work harder so I can provide everything for my son. Not the kids fault you should not feel resentment towards kids
Just remind your kids as always what is important to you all, each other.
Not your kids grandparents. You aren’t married, his parents do not have to do anything for your kids.
This is a tough one because I’ve seen it from both sides. It’s not so much that they’re bragging about what they got, but excited about what they were able to receive. Perhaps it could be a learning experience where you could talk to them about having a little understanding for those who have less, But also to talk to your children about how to be grateful for the things they do have when others have what seems like more.
Neither side of the situation should feel bad about where they stand
If grandparents are your partners parents id stop them going every week or get hubby to have word with his parents nicely and explain. We want all 5 treating same as you are now family unit.
If grandparents are on mums side then really its upto them how they spoil them. Its past yours and hunbys control. Its down to you to explain to kids, and make kids see they dont have to buy for your kids as not related
It’s not the grandparents responsibility to buy gifts for children other than their own grandchildren. Teach your kids that they don’t always get what they want, especially people from people that have no relation to them. It sucks as a kid to not get everything you want but it’s much much worse to be living under the roof of a resentful step mother.
Wtf you resent kids because of this?? Do all of you a favour and just let them go, or work more so you can buy your kids things too. The grandparenst can buy whatever they want for their grandkids. Your kids are not their grandkids…
My kids were by two different husbands . My boys never got a whole lot and my daughter has gotten to travel the world and always has had everything done for her by her dad and his parents . My boys never felt sorry for themselves and were always happy for my daughter . I am so thankful they weren’t jealous of her . Maybe because she was a girl and they were boys ? I don’t know . I hope your kids can work through this . It will be hard , but it can be done . Lots of luck to you and your kids .
Just try and explain to your kids that some people have more money than others and at weekends do things with them so they feel special doesn’t have to cost alot of money either . Swimming cinemas park(depending on their ages ) . My kids are 4 and 5 they couldn’t care less about brand stuff but do love spending quality time together . They also might feel abit left out with other kids coming into your home ect . Give them extra tlc they are your propriety
It won’t change until YOU STOP IT
Girl grow up! Those are your children nobody has to do for them but you. You to damn grown to be resenting children than your bringing your kids into this.
How petty…let it go and stop being so jealous.
This is a hard one. When you have kind of a mixed family with different parents/grandparents it’s bound to happen. Your step kids shouldn’t have to hide excitement but your kids shouldn’t have to feel left out. My two boys have different dads and I’ve had to explain to them both that they won’t always have what the other has. That’s just how it is unfortunately BUT with that being said… I am lucky because both sets of families within reason try to make sure the other doesn’t feel left out. That’s a really shitty situation … maybe dad can explain to the others that they are hurting your kiddos feelings if they’re at an age of understanding?
If I where you all kids are to be treated the same. Meaning those kids might not be biologically their grandkids but those are still their grandkids. All kids must go with grandparents and if they refuse and dont treat them all the same then I would speak to your husband and not allow grandparents to see the children until they accept all the kids!
I’ll be the one to be different on this post. I totally understand your feelings. I have my daughter and married my husband with his son. He goes to his grandparents a lot and my daughter felt the same way. My parents treat my “son” just like their own and I expect the same from my in laws. It’s not about they aren’t responsible for buying your kids things. But you guys are together and they should want to. He needs to have a talk with his parents.