I have a massive issue with my stepson. He lies and steals. He is 8. Well, over the weekend, he stole 450$ from my hubby. He went back to his mom’s and told her he found it in the woods. This was Saturday. She took them out to eat, gave him 50$ for chores he has done, and kept the rest. Sunday, he realized it was missing at the pickup stop. So he confronted both mom and stepson. Mom gave my hubby 100$ back. Both stepson and stepdaughter said mom deposited it in her account. My hubby texts her saying what they had said, and she sends a text with a screenshot of her bank statement saying she only said that to them because stepson was freaking out about taking his money. My hubby never once asked for the money back from her, claiming he has no evidence that she took it this woman has put us through hell and back for the last four years. I seriously think my hubby is scared of her. She is quick to pull the kids out of his life if she isn’t getting her way. Well, no punishment was made for my stepson. Mom condones the behavior, and my hubby was like he told the truth, so basically, he is clear of all punishment. I’m at my wit’s end. This isn’t the first time we have had issues with stepson. He told his mom a year ago I slapped him, and mom took the kids from hubby for eight months, then filed a bogus restraining order on him and said if she kept the kids away from me, she’d drop it and the courts allowed this. So for three months, he couldn’t bring them near me. I had a harassment order on her for stalking and harassing me. It’s good for two years. Things were very quiet and good for months, then this happened with the money. Now I’m debating on whether or not I should just leave this relationship. I thought the worst was over, but I can clearly see that it has just begun. We have a two-year-old together, and our relationship is very healthy, and we get along pretty well. Well, I mentioned to him that no punishment for his actions is showing him from both parents that this is ok. He made it very clear that it’s his kids, and he will do what he wants. In my eyes, it affects all of us because that was rent money, so I should have the right to express myself. After all, he says we are in this “together.” I can’t deal with the stress of this woman anymore. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t stop worrying about this and how much more B’s is going to happen and him too scared to stand up to her. She has really screwed me over in so many ways, and she thinks dcf is her lifeline, and she is always calling them on us. I live a simple life. I want a simple life. I’m not going to get that with her, and I don’t think I can do this for another ten years. I need advice on what I should do. It’s not fair to my two yo not to have her parents together. I feel horrible about this, but I’m truly at my wit’s end. Please help. Thank you.
I’d be gone. It won’t change. Coming from experience…
You have a mess tell hubby its them or you if he picks them theres no love there or respect for you
Why does he not have 50/50 custody???..I wouldn’t want me and my kids in a situation like that. His step son is going to grow up to be a thug and probably end up in jail since they condone this behavior.
It might be best for you to leave. Things probably won’t change or get better anytime soon. So you either will have to keep going with things the way they are or make a change and leave. It may be best for you in the long run. And your child can still have both of her parents in her life.
Girl run. That shit is so extra and not necessary. Save yourself and your kid a lifetime of stress.
I’d leave. Sounds like you two would be able to co parent, or at least hes not gonna fight you for your child. He isn’t going to change and after this long and another child he still doesn’t see you as part of his family, you’re wasting your time.
Sweetie your gonna do what you want but id tell him things gotta change or your gone if he dont youll see his true colors
If hubby isn’t willing to stand up for himself now, he never will. It’s time to either lace up your boots and get ready for war or march your way out.
Also how is it not fair for YOUR child to not have 2 parents together, but ok for his children? What’s not fair is using your child as an excuse to put up with unacceptable behavior.
Asking the question is also telling the answer…
Sounds to me like the mom is putting the 8 year old up to doing this stuff just to get at you. I dont know very many 8 year olds that would steal money from their dad. Let alone turn around and give it to their mom.
I have an 8yo that due to PTSD does some things that a typical 8yo wouldn’t do… but… stealing $450 is WAY over the top…
Omg! So srry. To hear ur going thru this. I would myself up n leave just to keep it healthy for urself n kiddos to be honest. Not gnna change at all,its a repeating cycle,sad but true
I pull the “they’re my kids” shit all the time so I can’t help with that. Kid should definitely be punished for taking that but it’s not exactly reason enough to split up a family.
I feel so sorry for you but think of your little one! Be strong and healthy for her. Worry about her only. I don’t think anything will change for the other part. Hang in there. Seek professional help/advise.
Bethany Russell said it
Yeah. I couldn’t stay around for that mess. You would be way happier with just you and your child. Get rid of the drama, you don’t have time for that!
I’d leave. Pack your stuff and run
When he wants to see his child with you he’ll make the effort.
This sounds like a set up. Who says they “found” $450 in the woods of all places. And the first person he runs to is Mom? Yeah, check that bitch real quick. She’s out for you.
Leave. Things wont get better and thats teaching him its ok