I have been in a relationship with someone for 2 years now. I haven’t been feeling well so I’ve been resting a lot this weekend. My toddler just came up to me and said “Matt” is being mean to me, he smacked me. I asked him where did he smack you, and he shows me on his putter thigh. So long story short, I asked him if he smacked him, he denied it. He admitted that he told him he would smack him but didn’t follow through with it. I called my toddler into the room, and with the saddest face, he again said, “Matt,” smacked me right here. My boyfriend sat there and looked surprised. I told him he had to go, and I have to believe my children, and I ended it with him. As he was leaving, my toddler starts begging him not to go, and after he closes the front door my toddler starts crying, saying I want to give him a hug mommy and asked me why does he have to go, mommy? I said because he has to baby. So I’m filled with emotions of anger, frustration, and confusion. I have seen too many news reports on boys friends abusing their girlfriend’s children or worse, killing them. Please anyone that’s gone through something similar gives me advice?! I immediately jumped into mama bear mode and kicked him out. I tried googling some things, and a lot of stuff came up about toddlers lying about people hitting them. So that confused me even more. I know I did the right thing, but my blood is boiling at the thought of him hitting my child. Even a light smack is infuriating. We’ve discussed that he will not discipline my kids ever. My toddler is rambunctious and gets on people’s nerves, but he does not deserve to be smacked, especially by someone we’ve established wouldn’t punish him at all. I feel so confused. Sorry, I want to add in. Also, he’s never been abusive towards us. He has no children, so my fear is he is less tolerable with them. But I still can’t take what my toddler told me lightly
Good for u nobody should lay hands on ur baby !
You did the right thing. If your toddler likes him he had no reason to lie about him, and truthfully toddlers really dont lie- not like that. Protect your baby and let that man alone.
You’ve been with him two years and you’re worried he’s less tolerable why stay for two years?
You did the right thing! Good job listening to your toddler. Even if he “only” said “I will smack you for misbehaving” you have already established that is NOT how you wish to parent your child.
You need to ask your child again maybe tell the kid how important it is that he dosent lie about things like that … it’s just a hard situation I’ve never been through I hope you can figure it out… my niece has gotten this habit of lying to instigate things I’m not gonna get into that but we knew it was a lie for sure…
You did the right thing.
Believe your child! Always stand by your kid
2 year old relationship, with a toddler- Means that kid looks at him like a father and discipline comes with being a parent
If this is the only time in two years then I think you jumped the gun on kicking him out.
I have had experience with toddlers lying but not often at all. They really don’t make things up. I would maybe ask him in a few days again if “Matt” smacked him and see if the answer is the same. Ask your boyfriend again at that point and see if the answer changes. I think you did the right thing. We had a lady here where I live who had a live in boyfriend kill her son… So I would believe your son and ask him again in a few days.
So he’s taken care of your kid while you were sick?
He smacked your kid apparently and the child was mad and wanted a hug from him when he left?
I think you need to have a heart to heart with him and your kid!
I think you overreacted to be honest after two years he should be able to discipline your child especially if you are expecting him to help raise him
kids have got to come first
If hes not part of parenting then why is he living there? You cant expect him to plan a life with you and not be allowed to discipline the kids
Hes been there 2 years. He should have a say. Or take care of your own kid. I grew up old school a pop on the butt on leg was normal.
Kids lie. All the time. Especially if they think it will get someone else it trouble. Remember that.
…so the person who has been there since the kid was born isn’t allowed to correct him? Not to mention kids lie, dude. You’re gonna die alone, lady. Or do something crazy and creepy with your poor kid when he gets old enough.
So you’ve been with him 2 years, probably expect him to help you take care of your child but can’t discipline him? That makes no sense in my opinion.
Good for you but that being said I’d have at least checked for a handprint or something first.
If you don’t want him spanking your kids that is totally fair!
However why would you be with someone, long term if you dont want to parent with them? How can you expect someone to care for your children if you don’t let them.
If you dont think he cares about your son the way you do then you did the right thing! But hopefully you find someone to love and parent your child the same way you do.