My twin sister died earlier this year and was very, very sick through the holidays last year. And most days, it doesn’t seem real that she’s gone because then I have to accept that a huge part of me is gone forever. But with the holidays coming up, I’ve been extra emotional as these will be the first major holidays without her. And my daughter has been wonderfully supportive and loving, and my parents and I are there for each other, but I feel like most of my friends have basically abandoned me because they don’t want to deal with my emotions, even though I don’t really talk about it that much. Only two friends even came to the funeral. I guess I just don’t feel like I have much support at the moment when I need it the most, even though I’ve been there for all of my so-called “friends” in the past when they needed someone. Sorry for the long rant, I guess my question is just asking for advice on how to manage the holidays this year without falling apart the whole time?
Hug ur kids play with babies or young little ones. Appreciate every moment with those there with you. And try do something you just know your sister would have wanted done. And live thru that. It never gets easier. Those feelings never go away. There always gonna be a trigger moment. The greater the love… The greater the grief. And that itself is a blessing
Celebrate her Life that she did have, remember the good times, talk about memories with the family
I’m so sorry you feel like that and I’m so sorry that you have to go through this there’s not really much anyone can say that will change the amount of pain that you’re in but I’m praying for you and I hope you pull through the holidays with ease knowing that she’s not in pain anymore and just honor her keep her memory alive talk about her. She’s watching over you I hope you and the kids and your family have great holidays this year
I’m sorry for your lose hun. I can’t say I understand what your going through having never experienced the loss of a sibling myself. But I know that when my Grandad passed a few years ago, Birthdays and holidays were the worst for me. I would always turn around and almost ask my grandad if he wanted a second helping, or if he wanted the second corner piece of a Birthday cake (his favorite). The first holidays were the worst for me. The hurt has never left me, but as the time passed, I was able to peek past the pain (its was still there) and I was able to remember the parts that he loved the most. Like how he would always get the smallest helping at Thanksgiving so he would have more room for the desserts.
This is normal. It’s called seasonal depression. Ask your Dr. To give you something to get through. I had to do this and it help.
Fall apart. Cry. Scream. Then do your best to get through it. You loss your other half. Twins are different. Losing a sibling is hard. Losing a twin even harder. You have a right to be upset. Those friends aren’t your friends. Those arent your village. Work on finding your village. I am so sorry for your loss. Don’t bury those feelings. Feel them. Release them. Love her through the space that separates yall. It wasn’t goodbye. It was see you later.
Try and celebrate her life, not her death. Xx
Im so sorry. I dont know what id do if i lost my twin. Do whatever you need to do. There is no right way to grieve when you lose someone so close.
My lord my God is your comforter, your guide and your strength ,lean on him
I’m so sorry for your loss. My dad passed on Thanksgiving. I know it’s hard. I just keep remembering that he’s out of pain & in a wonderful place. Talk about her at family gatherings & try not to be sad. She’s probably hanging out with you & wouldn’t want you to be sad.
I am sorry. I lost my sister two years ago and she was very ill. The tears we shed were real but mostly out of gratitude that she no longer suffers. The later grief comes when you want to speak with them about good news and you cannot. I think deep grief lessens when you look at all the pieces of the puzzle. I miss her, a lot but after seeing her without pain, gratitude for her well lived well loved life with her family friends and her God, I can let it go a little at a time.I hope this time comes for you. God Bless.
So sorry for your loss .An you have every right to cry an scream if you want to. God Bless you an help you heal .
I’m in same boat hun nothing go going changed this how we feeling for whoever we lost closts keep them in ours heart and remeber that they want us be happy and keep our head up for mods sakes…dont let kids missed out what you and your sis had in past what you had fun enjoy holiday and stuff like that do treasures that with your children as remember that I know it’s hard
Holidays are the hardest and dont get any easier they just get manageable she is with you in spirit your bond as a twin is different and may effect you more then others. None of your friends will understand what your going thru unless they have lost a sibling themselves they may not know how to help you. From my experience I’ve tried to include my brother in some sort of way during the holidays remembering the good times. Lots of tears and emotions but deep down they want you to be happy keeping her memory alive will help you in coping with the lost maybe try a councilor or pastor talking about your feelings or even writing them done is a way of healing
Never been there but I do emphasize with you. The pain of it never really goes away you just learn ways to cope with the pain and emotions. Once you get in a better place try to think of happy things yall done together and try to keep them alive for your kids and if she had any kids for her kids too. You take one day at a time and try not to think of her as gone but not sick anymore or in a better place. Dont let anyone tell you that you’re taking to long to grieve just try not to let it lead you into depression.
Go to therapy, it’ll be hard but so helpful
I feel your pain. I lost my brother 2 weeks ago to suicide. I’ll never understand but I’m happy hes no longer suffering. My plan it to continue on with our traditions with my kids and hope for the best
I’m sorry about your sister. I recently lost my mother, and am also devastated. Accept that you will grieve and let yourself do it. How to get thru holidays. Remember good times from years past. Embrace the good memories. And if you need to cry, then cry. Anyone that expects you to just bounce back after this kind of loss, is delusional. Take care.
I am an identical twin myself. I can’t imagine how you feel and I am so sorry for your loss. It’s hard to explain to others the bond since they don’t know what it’s like. You weren’t even in the womb alone let alone most of the time after that. Just know she will always be apart of you and is with you in your heart. The bond you had transcends death and you’ll see her again.