Needing advice from moms with blended families

Hi everyone. Moms with blended families, maybe you can help! I’m with my boyfriend, he has a daughter, and I have my two girls. Our girls are young. I have a few things wrong with this… His child’s mom and I get along very well. She’s told me in the past he asked for her back, and he admitted it but said it was at the start of our relationship, so it didn’t matter. He will buy her coffee in the morning even though she didn’t ask. He and his mom drive her around for the kid’s appointment and such. His mother never asks me how I am, she’s constantly texting his kid’s mom and her family, and even she thinks it’s weird. This has been ongoing. He’s lied to me about going places with her like shopping and such; at the beginning of our relationship… he got really drunk and ignored me all day and hung with her. We’re now three years in this, and I’m not over it. It feels like he’s doing nothing to provide us a house. I’m working full time, too, and it’s like he just wants to live with his mom. He will constantly be at his mom’s. His father also told his kid’s grandmom on her mom’s side I was nice, but I come with baggage (my kids). He will complain about driving my girls to school in the morning; he is fed a hot meal every night by me. I clean and cook and work. There’s so much. His mom told me once it would be easier off the kid had her mom and dad just in the picture without me. Our kids constantly fight. All five of us share a room. I’m so sick of it. However, I feel like staying together is easier. He’s constantly arguing with me about dumb stuff like how my kids should be raised religiously or whatever. I’m scared of heartbreak. It’ll kill me to see him with someone else, and to be honest, I feel like we sometimes stay just for the sex. I just needed to vent, but everyone’s mad at me for taking him back constantly. My kids do love him, but I don’t feel like they are treated fairly because I feel like his child is praised a lot more. Is this something you work through, or should I have left when he asked for his ex back? She did say no at the time he asked. He tried to say he didn’t ask for her back; he asked her what she thought about if they were together again, which is the same thing, in my opinion.

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Easier said than done but…let that one go.

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You should have left a LONG time ago.

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Girl, straight up LEAVE. And I don’t say that lightly. But that is massive bullshit. You can do bad all by yourself why even have him there at this point. You will find someone so much better. Trust the process

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It won’t get better! 3 years, he is stuck in his childish ways… He will start treating your kids like crap more and more… I know it’s easier said than done, but leave… You and your kids deserve better!

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Sounds like you need to move on in my opinion. Sex isn’t enough to stay with someone who treats his ex better.

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This isn’t a blended family… this is a mixed mess that you’re calling a family. It’s time to let it go so you can all be happy.

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Honestly I would just leave because all your doing is hurting yourself an then babies… you an then kids need someone who’s gonna out you first… I get he has a child with another woman but you are his girlfriend he should be putting his kids with her an ya first not bring her coffee an hanging out with her…

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You should have been gone.

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Sounds like he wants to be with her… seems like if he was serious about you then he would be wanting to move in with you

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Girl show him the door. You and your girls deserve better than that. If after 3 years nothing has changed it never will. He needs to grow up.

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Run for the hills hun

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Isnt going to change. Cut your losses

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He has two moms, his other one and you. Your only advantage is you occasionally provide sex too. He has no reason to change. You are a place holder until he can get back with his ex.

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You don’t have kid’s together. Leave! It won’t change unfortunately.

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Sounds like he is already with someone else in my opinion. You and your girls would be much better on your own and deserve better. Remember you are showing them what to look for in a relationship and what is ok to put up with for “love”.

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The disrespect from his parents alone would be a deal breaker for me. The only feasible way I could see someone trying to work past it is if they had a child together

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Move on for your sake and especially for your kids

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Let him go. He’s not done with his ex, whether she wants him back or not.

This is a relationship of convenience and the longer you stay, the harder it will be to leave

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It’s been 3 years let it go he is not making an effort to make a real family with you.

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