My son wants to spend mother’s day with his step mom bc his dad said they were doing something.
Absolutely! If it were to freak him out then he isn’t the right fit for your family anyway! You don’t have to go overboard or anything like that just have the children make him something special and make him a nice barbecue dinner
yes yes yes! if yall been together this long and hes loving them boys and you and making effort YES, he deserves it! and the kids should be allowed to show him without him feeling weird about it especially after this long! jes their role model an been a father figure dont hold them back I bet he will def love it!
You can celebrate “FATHER FIGURE” day if “Father’s Day” is a little much.
It sounds like you are having doubts about your relationship and using fathers day as an excuse…i think you should celebrate it
Do it the kids want to show their appreciation to this man that stepped up don’t show them it’s wrong
Just let THEM do what they feel, he has blessed their lives, let them bless his, he would’ve never stepped up if it wasn’t important that he have their respect, and unspoken permission to be with Mom. They know who their real Father is, but this Man seems to be Dad. This Man is the one that will show up and represent them at games, and the kids at School won’t tease them for not having a Man figure in their lives, if he’s the Man that will teach them to be Men let the relationship take its course, don’t pick n choose what they can need him for or not.
Are u asking permission to do what u want?
Remember…this is NOT about you, its about the kids…
Talk to the boyfriend an see how he feels
Let them do it and do not intervene. It will be fine. A person can tell a child’s present picking vs an adults.
Of corse they may need guidance however let them take charge accordingly (safety & money wise)
You are asking strangers for family advice, I think you have bigger problems to deal with.
If you’re worried about him being freaked out about it being too soon, just approach him and ask how he feels about it and go from there.
That’s a question for your boyfriend, not us. If he’s in, then happy days. If he’s not ready, then you explain to your boys that it isn’t time yet. But the only person on this earth who can tell if it’s OK to let your boys start treating this man like their step-dad, is him. That is assuming you’re OK with it, which I feel is clear from the fact that you didn’t just close your boys down when they brought it up.
Do it he obviously is a father now
Let them. If that’s how they feel, let them do it.
That first sentence answers your questions. The boys want to do it so it’s not to early. 2 years is a very good amount of time. He won’t freak out that’s just your worries.
After 2 yrs , I would think your boyfriend would find it heartwarming that he was thought of , let them do it and say nothing , just watch and let them share the specialness of the day
Let the boys do whatever they feel. It may be just a hand drawn card or chocolate. Don’t intervene. Act surprised that they did that by their own choice
Celebrating someone having a positive influence in your life should never be a question… it’s a sign of gratitude
If your kids want to show him how special he is to them I say let them do it. I think your boyfriend will love it.
It’s from the boys, not you! Go ahead.
Have a chat with the kiddos and if they want to do it you should. How does he feel about them? If he feels like he is a father figure then absolutely. My son has three step daughters that he is only been in charge of for a few years and they absolutely adore him so I know they will celebrate him on Father’s Day and he will love it and I’m so proud of all of them. I think it’s probably better to go ahead and celebrate than not to.
Two years…too soon? I can’t imagine not knowing someone enough after TWO YEARS of living life together and you’re unsure of that?
If your kids are excited to do something for him, I’d say he more than deserves it
Of course, it will bring them closer
yes. There are no rules and a parent doesn’t mean blood.
Being a bio father does not make them a father just like a boyfriend sounds like the bond there is stronger
Do whatever you feel in your heart. Fatherhood is not about blood.
Life’s short…celebrate everything
2 years! Why not celebrate with him.
Do it, daddies don’t have to be blood to be a father, xx
So, let the boys celebrate with him. See where it goes from there.
If the boys feel that way about him go for it, he must be good to them if they want to celebrate him.
Let your boys do it … They can’t help how they feel and most times guy is ok with it. Just drop a hint to him if your unsure by saying hey the boys want to do something for you for father’s day hope that’s ok
Ask him, im sure hed love it
If you think he’ll freak out talk to him before and let him know how the boys feel. I think you should celebrate him.
I’d say 2 years is long enough
Absolutely i wish I could be with mum on mothers day and dad on father’s day
It would seem to be pretty easy to just ASK HIM…
My boys gave this to my husband, and they have a great relationship with their bio dad as well best of both worlds here.
Sooo you let the kids meet him, he takes care of them and yet it’s too soon to celebrate him? Either you celebrate him or move out the way so someone else can appreciate him.
If your children are comfortable with doing something for him then by all means celebrate it but allow them to choose for themselves.
Sounds like he is a good guy. If he has stepped up for you and the kids then he absolutely should be celebrated
Father takes dna; daddy takes a heart . I say if your boys wanna honor him and let him know he is loved and appreciated, go for it.
You better let that man know how much you & those boys appreciate him. Just my thought
If your boys want to do something for your boyfriend why not…
Father/mother’s isn’t always blood and kids see good so yes I’d do something
If your kiddos want to do something for him…do it!!! He’s stepped up in a major way and totally deserves to be recognized and appreciated. When my husband and I started dating, my daughter was only 6 mths old… she’s 20 now. Anyways, when she was old enough to know what Father’s day was, she wanted to do something for him & I had the same reservations you do. I let her do what she wanted for him and he absolutely loved it. I had a whole “speech” planned for why we wanted to do something special for him…but didn’t need it.
Definitely do it! He sounds like a great guy, and you said he’s already stepped into table father role, I’m sure he’d love whatever they have planned
Yes. Do something for him. Doesn’t have to be huge… my son is a step father and his wife always did something for him for fathers day from the first year they were together.
Yes. Give that man the recognition he deserves. Even if you just help them make him cards, I’m sure he will love them.
You can celebrate with a small token of your appreciation, and just make sure the card is for someone who stepped up to fill a fatherly position, and not “thanks for being a great dad”. You can give it to him and at the time say, just a little something to show you we appreciate all you’ve done since coming into our lives. Then its more like a thank you gift on fathers day than an actual fathers day gift, you know? Less pressure.
Yes he needs to be celebrating with them
Let the boys do something if Bio dad isn’t in the picture but ur boyfriend is he is the only “father” they know. Let them show him how much they appreciate and love him. I’m sure ur boyfriend will be very grateful
If your kids want to then do it.
They’re the ones that want do it… I say yes if he’s been a dad to them and they want to
Sounds to me like your boyfriend is their father. A father does more than donate sperm to create a child. They provide for them, are emotionally supportive, etc. Let them celebrate the man who is doing that for them.
Blood doesn’t always make a dad. Actions do. A father figure in their lives As biology
Since the boys suggested it, I’d say go for it!! That is so sweet!
Well, if he’s doing the daddy things, and if it’s the boys’ idea, it sounds lovely. Maybe don’t call it “Father’s Day”, say “Mike’s Day”
Let them! If he freaks out he aint the one for you sis
Do it! My girls loved doing something for my husband for Father’s day when they were little I thought it might freak him out but he loved it! He loves being recognized for what he did! Definitely let your boys show they appreciate everything he’s done.
Do it. It will show him appreciation a d that your boys love him.
Let your kids do it. He’s been with you for 2 years so that means a lot.
Just because he didn’t make them doesn’t make him any less of a dad, especially if the biological father isn’t in the picture. Just because you two aren’t married and he doesn’t have the official title, doesn’t mean anything. If he has stepped into the dad role and does everything a father should, let those kids celebrate that man because you have no idea how rare that is!
Always let your kids lead you through these types of things. This is so sweet
Of course. It can be as simple as a card to the boys making him breakfast. Better yet, they can make the cards with a heartfelt message from them, i.e., “You’re the best”, “I love you”, “Glad you are my friend”, whatever they feel. Make it special😊
If you are still lucky enough to have your own father you should be celebrating with him. Your boyfriend is not your father. Secondly, yes there is enough time in the day to celebrate both if your kids feel they want to. Sounds like he’s deserving.
Talk to your BF and says the boys would like to do something for you for Father’s Day and see what he says. I would let the your boys do something since their father isn’t in the picture and your BF is.
Ask him how he’d feel about it.
If he has voluntarily been present I doubt he’d have an issue.
Maybe just do something small then
Let the kids take the lead, but yes support this idea. It’s important to teach them to respect and be grateful for those who care for them and look after them. Your teaching them very good traits for when they are grown. Your bf will be touched.
Do it!! You don’t have to go all out but you can show him he’s appreciated
Ask him hey how would you feel if we did xyz for fathers day for you the boys brought it up
If your children want to celebrate him on Father’s Day let them. If you’re concerned that it could be over the top you can keep it low-key still allowing them to celebrate him on Father’s Day. It would let him know that they appreciate him.
Ask him his thoughts on it ahead of time? Don’t tell him your plans just ask how he would feel if y’all did something for him?
Like these other ladies are saying it doesn’t have to say “father’s day” … if he’s been around for two years and has been present and active in their life a little gift that says hey I appreciate you will probably be much appreciated.
Yes do it - I do for my step dad every year and I’m 45 next month- he has been my dad since I was roughly 7 or 8 years of age
It’s been 2 years . If the kids want to let them
If the boys are initiating it I think you should definitely let him.
I been with my boyfriend off and on for over a year but it’s because at the time we lived over an hour apart but last October we moved in together and going strong. He told me I’m stuck with him now forever lol. Well anyways I have an 8 year old daughter who was abandoned by her bio dad at 3 and my boyfriend stepped up as a father figure to her and she adores him and just recently she finally said she loves him which he’s been saying it to her for a couple of months and she finally felt comfortable saying it back like a week ago or so and I asked her if she wanted to get him something for Father’s day and she said yes because he’s been there for her. I’m not sure what we will do for him yet but I want it to be very special.
Don’t inhibit the children. If they want to do something for your boyfriend, it means that he has been a father figure for them, and they want to acknowledge that by doing something nice to show their appreciation for him being part of their world. If he’s been good to them, chances are that he will appreciate them acknowledging him in this way.
Whatever the future holds for your relationship is unknown. Live in the moment and appreciate what you have today … tomorrow is never promised. Allowing & encouraging your children to express themselves will be one of the greatest gifts you can give them.
We did something for my boyfriend we hadn’t even been together a year yet at the time but the bond between him and my daughter was amazing she was too little to do much of anything so I painted a canvas black and painted her feet white and put a little heart in the middle of her foot prints. And wrote him a little something on the back of the canvas he appreciated it we’ve now been together a year and 4 months.
I would, especially if it’s the kids idea.
Of course, it is their choice.
If the kids are truly behind it, leave it up to them. Let them show the appreciation. You need to simply stand by and smile.
Yes… if it’s from the kids and not you
I am the odd one out. Stepdad yes boyfriend no.
If the kids want to then I would def say yes. If it freaks him out then he’s probably not the one
Doesn’t have to say father’s day just get a card saying thank you and let the boys write a little msg and let them pick a little pressie why not
If the kids wanna do something for him don’t stop them. I wouldn’t push for it but if they want it let them show him how much they care that he’s stepped up and how much they mean to him
If that’s how your kids feel, is it really too soon. Just talk with boyfriend and see how serious he is about your kids. Might be a hard talk, but maybe get some assurances that if it doesn’t work out with you two, that he would still want to be that father figure for your kids.
If the kids want to then do it and if he freaks out tell him the boys asked to do it bc they see him as a father figure
Yesssss do it!!! I would just find some thing that doesn’t say step dad or forever… So he’s not scared but otherwise it seems like he loves you guys and he’ll be here… How stinkin sweet girl!!
Don’t feel some way let them do just that,
I’m a step mom my step son made me a mother’s day craft (keytomyheart) flip picture under it was me n him it was the sweetest thing ever I keep it in my memory bin with pictures n stuff. I been in his life 8years.