Can I trust this person again? A few weeks back, my two year old daughter and I were invited on a trip up north by my mom for a “girls trip.” My three sisters went along, and one of them drove separately, ending up secretly bringing their boyfriend along. So I guess my other sister was mad about that because she was told by my mom, “no boys allowed,” so she thought she couldn’t bring her husband and son. So she told me how mad and hurt she was with my mom and how she wanted to leave and never speak to my mom again. (I know it’s childish) she’s like 32, by the way. Anyways, after her ranting, my mom happened to come into the room and asked her if she was alright because she looked upset. And when my mom left, she accused me of secretly recording her talking about our mom with my phone. I honestly thought she lost her mind, and i very bluntly told her not to involve me and my daughter in any of her drama, that we were just there because we were invited, and I simply do not play that foolishness. She then got up and said something under her breath while walking away, and then I said, excuse me? And then she started yelling, saying that I was on my phone while she was talking to me, so I “must” of been recording her. And when my mom and other sisters heard us yelling back and forth, they ran into the room, and as soon as my mom got between us and while I was holding my baby (she was crying because of the yelling), she decided to threaten me that she wanted to beat me up and she said “put your baby down” I guess so she could watch her mom fight? Which I was not going to do because I know better than that, and I know my daughter doesn’t need to be anywhere near that foolishness. Anyways, after she picked this fight with me, I never spoke to her again. Fast forward to these days; she messaged me saying how sorry she was and that she misses me and my daughter. However, something in me doesn’t feel right about it, and I’m still in disbelief she even thought she could ever come at me like that. What do you guys think? Is family always family, so just let it go? Or keep this person far away from me? I don’t know.
She sounds very toxic. And paranoid. We forgive to release the part of us that wants revenge. Revenge is drinking poison and expecting the other guy to die. We remember so that we can avoid that pain again. Like touching a hot stove. The pain is remembered so we are careful the next time.
We get to walk away from situations where someone is very abusive
In your case, you have the added complication of a baby. I would never see such a person again. To expose a child to that seems abusive to me. She did not care about the baby at all.
Just because you all related by blood does not necessarily make you family. Families are suppose to stick together with each other and not make threats towards one another. If you feel in your gut that something is off then go by it. You are not in the wrong not allowing your sister around yourself and your daughter. Stay strong mama.
Honestly, I’m kind of in the same situation as you. It’s been going on for 6 years…ever since she told me I wasn’t her sister, that her friends are more of a sister than I was. All because I left my ex because he was abusive. I was so hurt and I tried to forgive at that point but things have been strained since. I met someone amazing and we got engage but instead of being happy for us I was stealing her thunder bc she is getting married this year and her time. That was the turning point for me. She attacked me over messenger saying these things. It continued with her attacking me after asking how my sick nephew was. I have not talked to her since. I am torn. Mostly bc of my nephew. But she has not apologized for anything. I’m supposed to be in her wedding but she never invited me to join anything to do with it and accuses me of not caring. So I just stopped. Not responding, not telling her anything. I can’t have this toxicity in my life. It hurts tho, alot. I wish you the best of luck and hopefully you are able to come to some resolution.
No contact, sadly. She sounds unbalanced in the extreme. Only SAFE family is safe.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Should I cut my sister off or forgive her?
All of u need to grow up and get over all the bullshit. U only get 1 mom and those are the only sister’s u will ever have! I wish I could fight with my sister again, but she died 2yrs ago. And now I’m losing my mom! If this was supposed to be girls only, then the one who brought husband and kid was dead wrong. 1 wknd not up ur man or kids ass ain’t gonna hurt anyone. Smh
She sounds mentally ill. Paranoia with the thinking she’s being recorded and sudden aggression.
Move on with your life and don’t give her the time of day for a long time
I have 3 sisters, we used to fight all the time when younger. Not so much as adu
I cut mine completely off! you’ll be better off without her it’s just gonna be one dramatic event after the other with her. Move on. She isnt necessary in your life.
She ain’t been in your life, keep it that way🤷🏻♀️ imo toxic is toxic and that was toxic AF.
Stay away. You’ll regret it later down the path if you don’t. Don’t be part of peoples toxic ways.
I just started talking to my sister about 6 weeks ago for the first time in years and years. I am afraid l will get hurt again so l am still leaving my wall up, until l feel it is ok to let down. We all need to go up and realize that on some things we can agree to disagree. My kids have missed out her in there lives for almost of there lives. And they are now 32/34
Dont do it. She sounds like she has a mental illness that needs to be addressed. I have been struggling with my sister for over a decade now and I just finally cut her off. It honestly wasn’t worth the drama and heartache it cause me and my children. I’m done with mine for good and it took a lot to get their. My sister took it to far involving my kids. When it goes that far just know she doesnt care about you or your baby.
Toxic is toxic no matter who they are.
I’d be honest and just say you still need space
You do NOT need permission to remove toxic people from your life regardless of what their title is!
Always follow your intuition…i would keep her away
Drop her like a hot potato. Family or not… Toxic is toxic.