Should I forgive my mother in law?

Should I forgive and be around my mother-in-law? So a little back story, my SO and I have been together for about seven years now and have two amazing children. And in that seven years, I am just meeting his mom a year ago because she decided to run off and live her life while leaving her two kids behind ( my husband at age 12). Anyways I’ve always got a sense of her being jealous and kinda butting in. I let it go, just thinking maybe she is regretful. Oh, what she missed out on, no biggie. So my husband and I got into a really big fight after Christmas, so he texts his mom to pick up some clothes from our house. He was going to stay on the couch there for a couple of days to cool off. Well, this woman took it upon herself to bust into MY house and start jerking things off MY walls while screaming that her son is going to move back in with her where he belongs, so of course, I defend myself and my home. I finally get her out of my house, and She calls the cops on me tries to get me arrested (I’ve never been any trouble) . I wouldn’t let her see my kids for a while but finally started letting her. I still have not spoken to or seen her since the incident, and I don’t know that I want to, even though my husband begs me to forgive her. What should I do?

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First off, he shouldn’t have had his mom go over in the first place to grab clothes. It’s you and his relationship even in bad times. His mother shouldn’t have been involved. Second, she shouldn’t have done any of that. Frankly, I’d tell her to kick rocks and she’ll see the kids on like holidays or birthdays but that’s as far as their relationship would go.

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She violated your home. I would never let her back in. Your children so don’t need someone toxic like that in your life. A hubby needs to deal with your decision or go live with mommy.

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oh hell no first she abandoned her kids she is no mother second he should have been a big boy and not had his mother get his stuff and how she acted sounds crazy ahe tried to get you her grandkids mom arrested imagine what else shed do . with that crazy eratic behavior you dont need that around your kiddos

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I’d keep well away from her if I’m honest

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That was completely inappropriate of her. She’s jealous because she was gone all of those years, and now sees her son with a woman that cares about and for him (something she didn’t do for all those years). She probably saw that fight as her chance to jump in and take over. You have to think of your kids, they shouldn’t be witnessing these things

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Fuck her off and tell your hubby to grow a pair and stand up for both of you and your children. She sounds totally toxic

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Sounds like a narcissist to me! I definitely wouldn’t allow her in my house anymore!

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He needs to have his mother come apologize to you and to then tell her that if she ever does anything like that again she is not welcome back. Maybe then you can forgive her. It’s going to be difficult for him as it is clear she is not stable and her abandoning him is a big deal.

Good luck to both of you. He needs support as do you - from each other. But if he’s going to choose mom I’m not sure I’d stick around

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I’d be done with her but your husband needs to keep her out of your arguments. He dont need to be at his mom’s to cool off.

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If it was me I wouldn’t. And your husband should not ever let her do what she did. I probably would have thrown him out. A husband is supposed to be there for you

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I would never talk to her and my kids wouldn’t be around her. She wouldn’t be allowed in my house and I would not give a shot whether or not the boyfriend agrees. He can go over and see his mother, but that’s his choice. Question though…he’s begging you to forgive her, has mommy dearest gone to the police and said she was in the wrong or apologized to you in anyway?? I’ve stopped talking to people for less just so I don’t have to deal with the drama…

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Hell no. My husband had a rough patch with his mom, as well, and though her regret is obvious, she is still respectful of both of us. Screwing up your relationship with your children is not an excuse to act like a crazy person. Sounds like your husband was better off without her in his life for those years if she’s that unstable.

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Nope. Dont bring that bs back into your life

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Stay away she’s there to serve her own needs if she cared about her kids she would have been there a long time ago but now she wants to serve her own needs and needs to fulfill her loneliness and guilt your husband needs to look out for you even during an argument he needs to protect his family not involve other people to make it easier to destroy

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Just let her back, n be like; well what’s going on? Please don’t &%$# with me n I won’t &%$# with you either. N start loving each other so the special guy can feel better. Live happily ever after

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I gave my boyfriends mother a million chances. We had our twins premature at 23 weeks in 2019 because of how fast labor went the last thing on my mind was calling his mom, two days after our daughters were born we lost our daughter lillian to brain bleed his mother made it all about him that I was an awful person for not calling her. I told her to shove it up her ass. I didn’t speak to her for months for my boyfriends sake I tried to forgive her and let her around our daughter the only time she came around was when it was convenient to her and only came around long enough to take pictures to post on fb acting like words best grandma. Couldn’t even remember her granddaughters birthday smh I cut her off im not gonna welcome toxic people in to my child’s life or someone who makes my daughter feel like shes only good enough for them when they have the time.

Naw. Mama gots to go. Point blank. :woozy_face:

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Hell no. I wouldn’t put up with that. My kids wouldn’t be around her either. Your husband shouldve never involved her in your fights to begin with anyway! involving others only leads to more issues in the long run. It seems to me, shes trying to play mommy many years too late and I wouldnt put it past her to overstep again.

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I wouldnt I’m sorry but I think she crossed the line completely. She obviously wasnt a good mother as it was to her own kids and abandoned them.

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