So I and my SO have been together for 15 years we have two kids together and have gone through a lot of crap together… He was working with this woman for the last few years, and I had noticed he would always talk about her, how she always goes out of her way to do little things for him, and at his Christmas parties when she would walk in his eyes. Would pop … I just had this gut feeling… so long story short, I decided to text him as her ( please don’t judge me, I had to know), and I said, oh, I always felt a connection with you, and he said I did too seeing you in the mornings was the highlight of my day. I then invited him over ( as her), and he came up with an excuse but made plans for the next day to meet up at her house for dinner and drinks. My heart broke, I knew I felt like there was something there between them, and he always said I was just crazy and jealous for nothing… Well, when he came home, I confronted him about it, and he said, “ I knew it was you. I was just playing along and swore up and down for hours that he only wants to be with me and only loves me etc. etc. etc… I’m at a loss on what to do it how to feel. To put a little perspective on our relationship, this man doesn’t go out with his friends, doesn’t drink or party, works his ass off 10-12 + hours a day, comes right home after work, doesn’t go to clubs, doesn’t have Facebook Instagram no social media at all, and doesn’t have a password on his phone and never hides it… this is why I am so confused… am I overreacting? Blowing this out of proportion? Please, mamas give me your advice; I need it
You busted him. He talked to her and knew it wasn’t her so it had to be you…and that is the best he could come up with. But you did kind of entrap him. He might not have ever said or acted on anything had he not been set up…so not even a true test… you failed.
So. You made a problem that wasn’t a problem because you were insecure. And are now mad about it.
Just break up already. Y’all are both extremely immature
If u feel the need to do that, then the relationship is failing.
YOU need counseling. He should be pissed!
Time for you both to go your separate ways
You already have your answer…
Yeah if you have to do all of that, then you need to leave. If he was that good of a man then you wouldn’t have these insecurities.
Maybe he knew it was you cuz he was with her…
sounds like YOU created a problem…grow tf up…
Get therapy for you and let him move on. Bc creating a problem in your mind, then convincing yourself its true, and creating potential drama bc of it Is definitely abnormal.
He didnt know it was you. He is lying. If he knew it were you then why would he put you through that and say those hurtful things. He would say Im in a relationship or something.
If he knew it was you, then he either would have 100% been a good boy to prove how wonderful he was… or made an outlandish joke of it, like “I’ll come over, but you have to dress like a sexy clown” or something. Him saying that he knew it was you, but still proved himself to be a cheater makes no sense.
You already have your answer.
He knew and was ready to cheat. Deal with it or move on
Yeah right! That excuse was just a way to cover his ass. He thought that was her. And let me tell you I thought the same thing about my ex. I swore there was no way he was cheating because he never went out if he did he kept in communication with me and when he was online he didn’t hide anything. He even told me if he was talking to a female and would let me see the convos and there was nothing out of the ordinary that I saw. Well I learned that was a ruse to throw me off so I wouldn’t think anything. Turns out he was trying to hook up with other females and was even bad mouthing me and even telling these women we weren’t together.
Even if he would have known it was you (doubt that) the fact that he was willing to do that to you is awful
Without trust you have nothing.
I’m curious how you texted him as her…? Did you like create a fake account and use her picture? Or did you have her phone? I’m confused by that a little bit.
Either way, seek counseling. You both need it.