Sleeping Arrangements

My ex lives with his gf and her 4 kids. We also have 3 kids from our marriage, that we share on a week to week custody basis. The sleeping arrangements there with all 7 kids are : 4 girls (2 of ours, and 2 of his gf’s) ages 8-11 in one room, a teen girl in her own room, and our 5 year old son shares a room with his gf’s 14 year son. I find this totally inappropriate for my son to be sharing a room with this kid. My ex keeps telling me there is nothing wrong with it. Am I wrong? I may be going for custody in January so I am looking for advice on this.


No your not wrong at all…it’s a fact that teen boys masterbate…so why would you want your 5 year old so in a room with him…not only will it cause your son to learn things about sexual behaviors too young but it’s a invasion of the teens privacy which will cause resentment and any number of emotional mental growth stunting or accelerating outcomes could abound. I would come up with another solution. Maybe if you have an office that should become the 5 year olds room.

Right now we are in a really small house so it’s me, my husband and the baby in one room. And the other 5 kids (13,12,8,7&4) in the other. Once we get our house it’s going to be this set up.

Myself and my husband in one.
Daughter (13) in her own room.
Bonus son (12) in his own room.
Daughter (7) in her own room, possibly with the 13 year old she hasn’t decided fully yet.
The boys (7, 4 & 2 months) in their own room.

11 yr old own room
9 and 5 yr olds shared room, bunk beds
2 yr old in our room

2yo in his own room in a toddler bed.
4yo 5 this month in her own room in a full sized bed.
11 day old in a bassinet sharing the room with mommy and daddy

Myself husband one room
17,13,13 one room with a triple stack bunk bed
7,2 one room

This depends on your state’s requirements. I know in Michigan according to CPS to share a room kids have to be legal siblings, 4 or less years apart & be the same gender. No more than 2 kids following those guidelines can be in a room. It’s tricky because those are CPS guidelines, not law. Theyd have to have a CPS case & get a caseworker to need to build points for removal.

I understand how you feel but I doubt that alone will win you full custody. If the children are being touched inappropriately, being forced to undress in the room with the girl friends kids or if they’re dressed inappropriately in the room with your kids you’d have a case.

Now that mine are older i have my younger ones sharing. Room and my oldest has her own space but as babies and with breast feeding we had many co-sleeping nights