Tips on dealing with an emotionally abusive ex husband?

I have never asked on here before. But I’m dealing with an emotionally abusive ex-husband who I have a baby with and need some advice.

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I have a mentally abusive one. While he doesn’t talk to me… thank god… if he were, er do share kids, I would only communicate through a third party.

Document everything and put a restraining order on him. If theres custody then have an officer meet with you two when you swap for the only communication.

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I went to court. The court makes us speak only through a app that you can download. The app is monitored and all conversations can be downloaded and taken to court. He us not allowed to call or text me. The communication can only be about our daughter. It has worked so far

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If you can’t avoid communication with him because of the baby look up the gray rock method it’s a great one to deal with emotional and mental abusive people

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I have the same situation and my kids are teens now, I just ignore him. Seriously… even in person, I walk away. We even grew up together, I’m 36 almost and I’ve known him and his family since I was 9. He recently even put his hands on me in front of our kids, my daughter refuses to visit him lately because of his behavior getting worst since getting a girlfriend a year ago. It’s a repeat of behavior, last time both of my children were almost killed by his wife. It’s been a rough go, but I’ve been in your shoes for many years. He hates it that I can ignore him. His opinion of me holds no weight and that affects him more than any words I say to him, can.

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Women’s aid, Freedom Programme :slightly_smiling_face:

Only communicate when necessary for the baby. Maybe get a moderator

I have just got done dealing with this one take him to court for all visitations and anything else that includes the child number to cut off Communications they will probably have you download and have to pay for an app to be able to communicate called my family wizard it was monitored and he can not abuse you and if he does he will be charged

Document everything never deal with him alone file for custody. Get your ducks in a roll and start protecting yourself and your baby it will only get worse. If possible find or make a friend with someone younger and fit that can be with you during an exchange even if it’s a a police station. Bitches like him othen times stop with thier bullshit when your with someone who is in shape. Just dont let the guy be confrontational. I learned from experience.

Document everything, record all conversations and don’t put your child in the middle. Get to court as soon as possible

For me, i always have to remind myself that he no longer has control over me. I get to hang up the phone now. Definitely document and record EVERYTHING. I wish i had done better at that. Stay strong, may not feel like it but youre free of him now. It’ll sink in eventually and dealing with him for the kid wont be so taxing eventually. Stay strong momma!

Your probably dealing with a abusive ex husband but you don’t have a baby with him he’s too old to be a dad he’s probably 70 years old lol

He could be my grandpa

Document every single thing. Dates, times, places, etc. If communicating by text, do so in a group chat with someone you can trust as a second set of eyes and who can keep a record of it as well. It always amazed me how my abusive ex husband would turn on the charm when he knew there was someone else watching or listening. There’s tons of good apps that you can use and set up to automatically record your phone calls as soon as they begin. Get yourself a good personal safe and keep paper copies of everything, printed out copies of texts or any type of communication in case something happens to your phone or your devices and accounts are compromised. I know it’s a lot of extra work but it will go a long way if you ever have to use it as evidence in court.

Best of luck to you, mama. Nobody deserves to endure abuse. Keep protecting you and your babe and keep pushing onwards and upwards :two_hearts:

I would suggest no contact I was there about 4 years ago I haven’t talked to him in over 3 years…he does get to see his kid tho

We have no contact unless urgent matters of the kid and by EMAIL only. Took him awhile to get used to it… I dont check it for a week esp if I got the child with me. . No sense right…

Im in the same. I block his number during the week. And unblock it on friday pick up. Until drop off. I call and keep him on speaker when the kids wanna talk. But i will be pushing for a judge to mentally evaluate him. Its too much on my kids.

Document every single thing. Dates, times, places, etc. If communicating by text, do so in a group chat with someone you can trust as a second set of eyes and who can keep a record of it as well. It always amazed me how my abusive ex husband would turn on the charm when he knew there was someone else watching or listening. There’s tons of good apps that you can use and set up to automatically record your phone calls as soon as they begin. Get yourself a good personal safe and keep paper copies of everything, printed out copies of texts or any type of communication in case something happens to your phone or your devices and accounts are compromised. I know it’s a lot of extra work but it will go a long way if you ever have to use it as evidence in court.

Best of luck to you, mama. Nobody deserves to endure abuse. Keep protecting you and your babe and keep pushing onwards and upwards :two_hearts:

Remember the most important thing… he is your EX-HUSBAND… you don’t have to deal with his abuse any longer… if it’s a problem with visitation… contact your attorney and find out how to go about meeting in a neutral safe place for the exchange… again you do not have to take that abuse anymore