My daughter is nine months. Her dad and I aren’t together and haven’t been since she was a month old. Through this all so far, he’s given me about 20$ and bought about three cans of formula. He has a girlfriend who might I add no good for him and tries to put her two cents into my daughter and his relationship. Like he owes me half of her car seat I bought, and he said he’d have it by this Friday. Then all of a sudden, I hear her in the background saying no, she can get a money order, and then he agreeing yeah, you can get a money order and saying he doesn’t want me spending the money on myself. I know for a fact he doesn’t think I’m going to spend the money on myself. I’ve taken care of our daughter for nine months by myself. It hurt because he knows I would and do everything for her. But now he’s saying he’s taking me to court to get shared custody. Might i add he saw her twice in October because he was hanging around his girlfriend instead of his child? My question is, would the courts give him shared custody. My thinking is I want him to have supervised visitation. He doesn’t have a single outfit for her. His car is broke, and he doesn’t have a place for her to sleep. I do not feel comfortable with him having shared custody as of right now. What would be the chances?
Unless he’s proven unfit he can get shared custody.
does he have gainful employment? That might be a good place to start
Depending on the state he’d have to prove he has the essential things she needs in order to be able to take her for overnight visits or have shared custody.
So, there is no real danger but you want him to have supervised visits? Stop being bitter and let him be a parent. You are not superior because you are a mother.
He’s her father. We as mothers almost always do more, but you sound like you’re keeping score and your daughter hasn’t even had a birthday yet. Give him a chance, new girlfriend or not. More than likely that’s temporary but he’ll always be your daughter’s father. You sound jealous.
He does need to have a bed for her and room for her to sleep in if he has her for some nights.
Unfortunately this is for the courts to decide and not you. You can bring all your concerns up in court though
I wouldn’t like him having shared custody either, if he wanted that he should’ve acted like it from the beginning.
I’d get in first if I was you, he has equal rights, he is not a danger to her so judge will grant shared custody, unless you can show them he does not know how to look after her, or if he agrees he needs to learn how to do things, best case he gets supervised visits while he learns, then he will get whatever he wants
At the end of the day that’s also his daughter. No matter how the relationship turned out. If he’s willing to get a little crib and stroller and buy her clothes and the essentials for when she’s there then it is his right to share custody. If you feel a certain way about his girlfriend then try to see if all of you can talk it out. Because you don’t know if that’s the woman he’ll marry one day and you’re gonna have to put up with her. So the best you can all do is leave the pettiness behind and be adults for the baby’s sake
It honestly depends on the state.
She does not sound jealous at all. Do you know how many so called “baby daddy’s” want to play to bloody victim card “I don’t get to see my kids” when they get a new girlfriend? Yes they’re literally just trying to show off in front of their new missus and make the baby mumma look like the asshole when unbeknown to others, prior to the new girlfriend he actually showed no interest in being father? And now a new girlfriend comes on the scene and wow automatically he wants to be father of the fucking year? Yeah she isn’t jealous, she’s looking out for the well-being of her child.
Doesnt matter what you spend it on. Omg men are ridiculous when it comes to helping. If he agreed to pay half and you covered his half then what he gives back is YOURS to do with as you please. Youre in for a long road
If he’s the father he’s going to get shared custody. And unless you can prove him to be unfit or abusive, he’s not going to have to have supervised visitation. The money order ordeal is probably to have proof that he’s given you money so when you go to court you can’t say he’s never given you anything.
They’ll probably give him supervised visits to start with because of the on and off relationship. But eventually, he most likely will get shared custody. His new gf and your bitterness have nothing to do with his parenting, if he really makes an effort.
Id fight to keep full custody of ur child hes proven unfit already and allowing his girlfriend to tell him what ti do it should be between u and the father not her
Tbh he most likely won’t get shared custody of your child at the age of 9 months old. My son’s father tried to get every weekend from Friday 4pm to 12 noon Monday when our son was 10 months old but ended up getting 4 hours 4x a week court ordered. My son is 3y9m old and his father only has 1 night a fortnight plus 3 dinner visits a fortnight plus a entire day once a fortnight but this is because of safety concerns and inappropriate living situation
He will get shared custody. He will not have supervised visits. Getting supervised visits is very difficult, my fresh out of recovery ex didn’t even have to have supervised visits. I can’t stand all these women on here pretending they just want what’s best for their kid when they really are just bitter that the babys dad left. Him giving you a money order isn’t a bad thing because he’s trying to document that he is paying for things so he doesn’t get screwed at court.
It’s not about you him or the girlfriend. It’s about that child.