When should kids be introduced to their fathers girlfriend? We just split up about a month ago and he is already seeing someone and she is also living with him. We do not have a parenting plan but I do not intend to keep my kids from him. I also don’t want them around someone I don’t know. I don’t even know how well he knows her…
It’s an extremely shitty situation. It’s way too soon to even be living together or introducing kids. But it’s just one of those things you don’t have a control over unless it’s proven to be a safety issue. I always say when you know you wanna keep them around long term is when you introduce￼￼￼
My ex and i agreed at least 6 months. Gives us time to see if that person is there for the long haul. Its not fair to the kid to constantly be introduced to new people all the time.
Maybe you should meet her first then go from there ! Unfortunately she already lives with him so if they do go over there they are gonna see her and be around her .
A month is way too soon. My kids father and I used to have a rule. A whole year with someone before kids meet them. The kids will be real confused or hurt if he introduces the new person to them soo soon.
Just because you don’t know her doesn’t mean you cant do a background check and doesn’t give you the say either. If you’re salty because he has someone new n that person now lives with him get over it. That’s like me telling my 37 year old ex husband no you cant move in with your father in law n wife in your in laws house because idk him. Tho he should have his own house by now because he has money n doesn’t pay me child support. Doesn’t mean I have a say. Or like how he doesn’t have a say if I want to take my child who’s 11 1/2 out hunting with a cop friend of mine his wife cant tell me what I can do with my child.
This post sounds very childish and unadult like. If you want to peruse this then take him to court but law states you have to have a good reason. What legal grounds do you have that will stand in court. Good luck pulling at strings. Best you move on and better yourself.
I wouldn’t for a year or at least 6 months. It gives you plenty of time to decide wether or not to go ahead with letting your kids meet them. I am big with stranger danger and having unknown people around my son. I don’t let anyone I hardly know or someone I don’t know around my son unless I’m there for safety reasons.
I think around 3-6 months is pretty fair, depending on how he knows her and how old the kids are. Also depends on where they’re at in the relationship. Obviously, living together is a huge deal.
Unfortunately not up to you. You don’t get to tell him who can have his kids around. It sucks that he’s doing this so soon and it will be confusing for his kids, but at the end of the day nothing you can do.
Get a Court order that way he can’t keep the kids from u ND u can’t keep the kids from him ND that way it’s not gonna be a she said he said thing
I met my stepsons after a month and moved in after 3 months. We’ve been together almost 11 years. 💁 Not your house, mind your business.
Welllllllll they probably already know her. But I would say they should be dating at least 6 months before it’s acceptable
This is the toughest part of coparenting, I think. One of the hardest pills to swallow is that you have ZERO control over this. If you and your ex get along well, I would ask to meet her before the children do. Remember though that he can refuse that and legally- you have no say unless there is proof of a good enough reason to not allow her around the kids. I’m sorry. This part of it all sucks.
I agree I would not want them around her she may be a drug user needles you name it child molester so the best thing to do is make it where it’s seeing if children at your house or going somewhere public for right now just tell them that it would just be easier for the kids at this point until he gets more serious with this girl
After a month??..naw…you and her need to spend some time together to see what the plan is, go to lunch together, a movie…is she just killin time , or is she for real…only then after you get to know her, introduce the children…
see how they respond/interact with her…see how she interacts with them…last of all, trust your instincts
I met my now husband, told him about my situation and the abuse I was dealing with at home. He saved me a got my out of there and I was open with him about having a child and everything. It was a fairytale love at first sight relationship and since day one he has shown me and my daughter unconditional love, he has provided for us and done everything in his power to support and care for us and give us everything we want and need. We have been together now for 3yrs and I am expecting our first child together within the next week. After he and I got married my ex married his then girlfriend, I told him I expect my husband to parent and father my daughter the same as I expect his now wife to parent and mother our daughter. Fastfoward and she left my ex because of his abusive behaviour and patterns but she admitted that he (my ex) only treated her as a glorified babysitter and she was the one spending time and money and energy on my daughter. She was the one buying and cooking food for her, she was the one buying her clothes and shoes and necessities. She was the one providing for my daughter while he went along galavanting and spending money on solely himself and depending on his family to feed him at 30yrs old. I say meet the girl first before passing judgement.
I could just say ask to set up a day and time to all do something so you can get to know her and observe how kids are with him
Ugh!!! This why I stayed 7 years longer than I wanted but the stress of my young kids with some other woman killed me. My husband already made “poor choices”, this me wanting to leave, so I didn’t who he might bring into their world!!! Prayers your your sanity!
My thing is if he plans on ever leaving your child alone with her for any amount of time to go to the store or run an errand, whatever…you should meet her…im sorry but a month is a pretty short amount of time…and like you said you don’t even know how well he knows her. Things can be done peacefully, but everyone needs to be on the same page and you need to know that your child is well taken care and treated right by anyone who’s around.
Not your business. He can introduce them whenever he pleases.