Basically, my husband and I have a baby he’s 6 months old. We got round to his parent’s house every Sunday for lunch, as soon as we walk through the door my husband takes the baby and hands him over to them, if I ask for him back he’ll say to me they need to get a hold, which I understand everyone wants to hold the baby. The baby is breastfed, and if the baby needs to be fed when I’m there, my husband will say we need to pick a night so my parents can call round as they didn’t get long enough to hold the baby today. Anytime we are in a family environment, he will make comments to me like my aunt needs a hold my cousin needs a hold my mum needs a hold, etc. I feel like I can’t relax for fear of offending anyone, and our baby has to be passed around like pass the parcel. It makes me so anxious going to family events because I feel the constant pressure to pass my baby around to make sure everyone has enough time holding him. I know they all love him, but my family doesn’t act this way. They let me lead, and I’ll willingly pass him over to family members and friends when he’s happy and content. Am I nasty for feeling like this? Do other families behave this way? I’m hoping for a different point of view. I’m beginning to wonder, have I maybe something with my mental health because I struggle with this pressure?
When with my husbands family, he gives our baby to them to be passed around the entire time: Advice?
My in laws always played passed the baby and as soon as he they got fussy I would take my kids to a whole other room away from everyone. They would calm down and just lay on the bed as happy as could be. Babies dont want to be passed like a football every time they are around family
Let him be a proud dad, relax ,in no time he’ll be wriggling out there arms anyway.Let your hubby show him off and enjoy the wee break while your there.xx the alternative is upsetting your husband, upsetting his family.Sounds like this is their normal while your family has there normal. xx
Nope… your baby should not be passed around
You’re mad because people love your baby?
To me you sound selfish and only about your family and friends. Your husband is a proud father and is proud to show his family his child. Why do you have something against his family? And not yours? Everyone loves the baby so why not let them love on the baby? Try to give some trust on your husband side. Your lucky that he is claiming the baby and loves his child. You are selfish and will make things difficult because of how you feel… Smh
If the baby is happy relax enjoy the break and allow his to be spoilt with love
It is his baby also. It’s not going to hurt the baby at all. I agree, jst try to work thru your emotions. I’m sure it’s not easy but there is no reason for anxiety. I’m sure as more babies come along this will pass. Baby needs to bond with it’s family also.
A little overbearing. Shoot I lived for the time when my infant could be held by others and I could enjoy myself at family gatherings. I mean, as long as it’s not just some fool off the streets.
It’s his baby too and he wants his family to get to spend time with him. It’s not like he’s handing the baby to strangers at a restaurant. This is your child’s family.
Post partum anxieties?
Hell no the baby shouldn’t be passed around it’s flu cold season 6 months old immune system not strong enough for that .
No you are RIGHT… No baby should be passed around like silverware or clothes… Put your foot down and explain your feelings to him… Not all energy is good energy ESPECIALLY family… Having a title or being related doesn’t make you the BEST choice or a requirement to hold my child.
Sounds like you have a little anxiety around his family, if you can just try to calm down. My family is the same way, use that time to relax and maybe take a nap while you can. Trust he or she is in good hands and with family. Everyone’s excited about the baby they all want a hold ya know.
I understand what your saying and get what you mean. It’s obvious your In-laws are going to want to have a cuddle though and I’m sure your hubby doesn’t mean to make you feel the way you’ve been feeling about it all. Maybe let them all just have there little cuddle and then ask for baby back. I’m sure they’d understand. But try to think of it as a positive too as in… you can sit yourself all the back on the sofa and babys not giving you a dead arm for 5 minutes lol xx
My family doesn’t act this way. A baby is held for a little while, everyone gets a child and mum usually gets the baby back or laid in the bouncy chair. My youngest is nearly 2 so doesn’t happen anymore
how is the baby taking it? If the baby needs more mom time, he should get it. Its your job to protect your baby, mama bear. This is your husband’s family. It is not your family of origin. Maybe you don’t trust these people 100%. I’m not assuming you have a mental health issue, but if you continue to be uncomfortable with this, it may help to get couple’s counseling to help you negotiate with your husband about this issue.
U need to chill. That child needs others in his life too. Create dome balance let the grandparents babysit. Live a little.
I wish I’d had my family to pass the baby around to, I felt like my baby missed out. My parents were long dead when I had my children😕. All thee family 1000’s of miles away
If this is your biggest problem in life, you really need to get a life. Grow tf up.