Would it be rude of me to invite myself over?

The mom of a friend to my 6 year old son asked that he come over swimming with them. They just put in a pool. The pool has a diving board, meaning there is a “deep end.” I saw pics of her son going off of it. My son can’t swim very well. I don’t know the mom at all. I’m nervous sending him there. I asked if she would be with them the whole time, and she said yes. But I’m sure she’ll need to run inside to go to the bathroom or something. This friend and his brother (around age 8 are very wild. I’m really nervous would happen if she leaves them alone just for a second. In my mind, I picture one of the boys saying, “Hey, let’s see how long you can hold your head underwater” or pushing him off the diving board. I’m considering telling her that since he can’t swim really well, I’m going to go with him. I asked my son if he would rather that I go or wear his life jacket. He said he’d rather me go. (He’s only 6, so he’s not embarrassed by me yet ). How rude is this (me inviting myself), and/or am I too paranoid?


I think that’s a valid concern. I would just tell her the circumstances and ask if you can tag along. If she says no, then consider keeping your son home.


No way. He’s only 6??? No way. I would totally go too!! Listen to your instincts.


Honestly I don’t blame you mama. A.) The water can be dangerous at ANY age, so if your son isn’t a good swimmer yet that can be dangerous. and B.) I wouldn’t send my child anywhere alone if I didn’t know the other adult/s well enough to feel comfortable (I don’t let anyone outside of a select few family members keep my kids, I don’t trust easily)


I do lots of parties for my kids and I appreciate when parents stick around I know sometimes they can’t cause they have other kids but especially when I have pool party you need to be a few adults and usually under 8 year old parties parents stay anyway


Honestly if the mom wouldn’t want you to go then my kid wouldn’t go. You hear too many stories about drowning accidents


I’m sure she will understand and she would probably appreciate you going and it can give you mama’s a chance to bond and be friends.


My children do not go to houses of people that I do not go. I would automatically assume the parents know I’d be there. Nevermind the whole pool thing. Don’t make it a big deal though. Set up the play date using “we”. Example: We will be there from 1 to 3 does that sound good?


Not rude I would think the invitation is extended being that he’s so young. I would want to go with my son as well just to know where and who he’s going to be with.

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Follow your gut…If you don’t want to leave your child there then don’t do it!!

NOT paranoid mama! Your child’s safety is of utmost importance.

She should understand. If not, she’s not the kind of person you’d want your little guy around.
#MomsHelpingMoms #HesYourBaby

I think you should go too until you get to know the kid and mom better. That’s your baby.

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ALWAYS go with your gut. You’re anxious about this for a reason. Maybe instead of the pool offer a different activity. My children never go anywhere without me if I don’t know the parents well. She should expect you to go with. If not it’s a red flag. Don’t leave him.

Why would you let your 6 year old go without you? Never apologize for being a mom. In fact, it’s kinda odd the pool mom did not invite you. That could definitely be a liability.


I would invite myself


I would deffo be going with a young child

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Don’t think for a minute that this is rude, it is NOT rude. We cannot rely on other people to watch our children near water well enough. And god forbid something happened you would blame yourself forever. I know of a gentleman that lost his son from drowning right around the same age and he’s going through hell because of it. We can never be too safe because in the blink of an eye it can all change.


Nope, I would totally go! My daughter is 11 and a decent swimmer but water makes me SO anxious. I was hesitant to let her go to the lake with her best friend last summer and I’ve known her best friends mother since we were in grade school. I know she’s a good attentive mother and would watch my child like her own but my anxiety was so high the entire time she was gone. I completely understand, and not knowing this mother would be a hard no for me.


Definitely go too! I would do the same.

Girl take TWO bottles of wine and make it a mom date.