My Fiancé Told Me My Grandkids Are Not His Because We Are Not Married: Thoughts?

A mom writes in asking for advice after her fiancé who she has been with for two years and lives with told her that he doesn’t see her grandkids as his own. Now she’s wondering if she has the right to be upset with him? She’s even considering moving back into her own home because she wants her kids and grandkids to feel like her home is their home.

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A member of the community asks:

“My fiancé and I have been together for two years (live together). I have four kids, [ages] 23, 18, 14, and 13 and now [I] have three grandkids. He has two kids, 14 and 16. He informed me Friday, they are not his grandkids because we are not married. I have even contemplated moving back to my house because I want my kids and grandkids to feel at home here. Am I wrong for being upset?”

– Mamas Uncut Community Member

Community Advice for This Mom Who Is Upset With Her Fiancé Who Refuses to See Her Grandkids As His Own

To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.

Advice Summary

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Our community believes that this mom’s fiancé should love her family as much as he loves her. He should see them as a package deal.

One commenter wrote, “If your boyfriend doesn’t love your grandkids and your kids, he doesn’t love you. You should move out.” Another person explained, “There are so many levels to answering to this post. Move home, that’s where you start. Stop putting the grandfather title and responsibility on a man who isn’t there for it. You can’t be upset about it.”

And one mom added, “That is ridiculous. Not enough to move back home, but they are just as much his grandkids as they are yours. My mother’s boyfriend has loved my daughter as his own grandchild since day one. He has always been known as grandpa. He is 100% her grandfather even though he is not my father and they are not married, and they have only been together 3 years. Your man needs to open his heart if you plan to spend the rest of time together.”

However, others seem to be confused as to whether or not this mom’s fiancé just doesn’t want to be called grandpa, but loves her family still. “Might be a package deal but he didn’t lie. As long as he is treating them good then nothing wrong with the truth,” one commenter added.

Do you have any advice for this mom? Leave a comment to help another mom out!

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