how can i help my daughter become more independent?

How Can I Help My Daughter Become More Independent?

A mom writes in asking for advice after her young daughter has become increasingly clingy and refuses to play by herself. Now she’s looking for advice on how to help her daughter become more independent.

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A member of the community asks:

“My daughter with be 6 in February, which makes it hard to study healthy parenting skills/tricks because I don’t know whether to put 5 years old or 6 years old. Anywho… my daughter has been increasingly clingy and wants me to play with her from the time she wakes up until she goes to bed! No joke. My therapist, who doesn’t deal with children said it’s bad for kids to not play on their own. I try to buy self-independent activities for her, yeah, right… she still wants me to play with her 24/7.

I’m at my witts end, and I now get horrible anxiety when she asks to play with me because it’s never-ending or ends up in a temper tantrum or meltdown when I say mommy needs a break, etc. I am a single parent. I broke it off with my daughter’s dad when she was about two years old. P.S. I used the timer in the kitchen to let her know when mommy’s time is up for playing until the next time we play. I praise her if she plays by herself, and I include her in housework also.”

– Mamas Uncut Community Member

Community Advice for This Mom Who Is Trying to Help Her Daughter Become More Independent

To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.

Advice Summary

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The moms in the community had a few suggestions for this mom. One commenter wrote, “Maybe get her into a therapist of her own. She might be feeling big emotions she can’t convey yet. The timer idea is great! It teaches her healthy boundaries and will encourage her to do activities on her own. But please, see about getting her a child therapist, it would help.”

Another mom added, “Sounds like she needs interaction with other children. A mother’s day out or something along those lines might be a good idea.”

And one other said, “What about kindergarten, or preschool? That might help so much also maybe you could try having a more relaxing interaction with your daughter? Putting a timer on when you’re playing sounds like a therapy session, not a mother playing with her child and this could hurt her feelings. Children can pick up on when people are not comfortable and they react on feelings. I hope things get better.”

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