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How Should I Go About Finding Out Who My Son’s Father Is?

How Should I Go About Finding Out Who My Son's Father Is?

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A mom writes in asking for advice because she’s lost when it comes to finding out who her son’s father is. The mom says that the father could be one of six men but because all of them knew she was pregnant at one point and never asked if they could potentially be the father, she’s wondering if she should just let it go. Do you have any advice?

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A member of the community asks:

“I’m seeking advice on how to handle the situation regarding the paternity of my son. When I was 18, I was very wild, in college, and slept around a lot. In January of 2017, at age 19, I found out I was pregnant. About six guys are the possible father of my child.

My son is now 32 months, and I am feeling conflicted about what to do as he gets older and asks questions. Each guy knows I got pregnant, but we never discussed that he could be theirs, so we just stopped talking.

Should I ask them each for a paternity test so I can have some answers and let my son decide if one day he’d like to pursue meeting them or just leave it alone since they knew I was pregnant and never asked if he could be theirs? I’m really just lost on what to do.”

– Mamas Uncut Community Member

Community Advice for This Mom Who Can’t Decide if She Should Find Out Who Her Son’s Father Is

To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.

Advice Summary

Many people in the community think the mom should figure out who her son’s father is, especially while he is still young. One commenter wrote, “Honestly I’d start with the one that he looks the most like and go from there. It’s a good idea to figure it out while he’s still young. Even if the biological father doesn’t want to meet him, he may want to meet his father when he is older and you shouldn’t deny him that privilege.”

Another person said, “You should definitely do paternity. Especially in case, there are any future medical issues with your son, etc. and I think it’s very mature of you to let your son decide if he wants to pursue meeting him.”

And one mom added, “I won’t judge because your choices aren’t my business. However, I think it would be wise to start with who resembles the baby more.”

Do you have any advice for this mom? Leave a comment to help another mom out!

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