One woman is asking Reddit if she is in the wrong for openly shaming her mother-in-law after she lied about her daughter-in-law’s fertility.
“My husband and I don’t want kids. He had gotten a vasectomy even before I dated him and I wanted to be childfree so we both knew it’s never going to happen. She didn’t know that my husband has gotten a vasectomy and believes that it’s me who is not giving her grandchildren, so she hated me,” the OP (original poster) begins.
“When I got married, she wrote this whole letter about how she can’t wait for us to be parents and read it out loud during our reception. She would cry on the phone with my sister-in-law about how I’m the worst thing that has ever happened to her. She would make racist Facebook posts targeted at me because I’m Asian and my husband is white. There have been times she would introduce my husband to different women when he’s already married to me and would tell him that he deserves better.”
You’re probably thinking “YIKES, how could this get anymore cringe?” Oh trust me, it does….
“Three days ago I was at a family gathering. I never really attend family gatherings because my mother-in-law is present there but it had been a long time since I’ve met his family. When I was just talking to my husband’s aunt, She casually says “I’m sorry that [you] can’t experience motherhood, how does “my husband’s name” feel about it? ” I asked her what it was she talking about, she tells me that my mother in law has been going around, telling everyone in the family group chat that I’m infertile. I honestly lost my mind.”
“I went up to my mother-in-law and asked her about it. She told me that she didn’t want to tell everyone that my husband is less of a man because he got a vasectomy done and thought it was better to tell everyone I was infertile.”
“I started to scream at her. Everybody in the room kinda started telling me that I shouldn’t be ashamed because I am infertile (they thought I was shifting the blame on my husband when I’m infertile) and I revealed the truth because I was not infertile. I told everyone about how my mother-in-law was spreading lies because she didn’t want her son to be “less of a man”.”
And the situation continued to escalate from there…
“I told everyone about her introducing my husband to different women because she wanted to replace me and is openly racist towards me. My brother-in-law calmed me down because I was bawling my eyes out and called my husband, asking him to come home.”
“My husband came home, his mother was crying and telling him that I ruined her reputation. She tells him how I’m trying to make him hate her. My husband took my side. He told her that it was the last time he would be stepping into the house and he is going to cut ties with her. We left the house.”
Thankfully, the OP’s husband had her back 1000%-!
“My husband thinks that I did the right thing, standing up for myself. I’ve been getting text messages from his relatives about how I broke a mother and son’s relationship. My mother-in-law is making posts about me on Facebook.”
The OP then added to her post with a few edits, revealing the following:
1. When my mother in law gave the speech during my reception, that’s when my husband told her about his vasectomy. 2. My husband didn’t attend the gathering with me because the next day was my birthday and he was planning a surprise for me. 3. Some people pointed it out that I shouldn’t have lashed out at a family gathering which is absolutely right. I feel bad for it and I know I could’ve handled it better.
One person said: “MIL shouldn’t be allowed to adopt at all! OP, she lied about you to make you the bad guy and it backfired spectacularly. If your husband is so done that he’s ready to go NC then you can be rest assured you are not TA at all.”
While another commented: “This! It’s very unsettling how some mothers demand grandchildren. Also, the mother-in-law ruined the relationship between herself and her son. No one else! NTA OP.”
What do YOU think?
With a background in the creative and educational fields, Amelia Finefrock is freelance writer, singer-songwriter and nanny based in Chicago.
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